My refuge...that's what this place has become. I realized a lot of things yesterday on my drive to work, some of it made me sad but over all I'm OK with it. First was that I have exactly 3 places left where I can just be myself and not have to worry about what others think. That's alone in my head, alone w/ my hubby, and here. Next was that by giving up Kat as a friend I've given up that entire circle, this doesn't bother me as much as it "should" because we were already leading up to this when Leo died. His death pulled us back together as a group but it didn't change the nature of the people involved. I need friends who will actually be friends, not just keep people around for when they need something. I have those now, outside that circle, and they remind me daily with their support that I don't need the baggage of the first circle.
My date...I really missed this guy, and no it wasn't really romantic or anything. Nothing that would get me in trouble w/ the hubby. I just really miss having him around. We had a big-huge talk (that I blushed through the whole thing) about high school and how he wished me and the hubby would break up and he is still interested. But he likes the hubby and wants me happy so he's going back to Chicago, but will keep in touch better now.
Baby news...She's already Daddy's girl. The other night I was reclining while reading and she'd give a little thump every couple of minutes, just enough for me to feel. He came up put his head on my belly and started humming to her and she started rapidly thumping his cheek
Of course he couldn't feel it, but he heard one big one (said it sounded like somebody thumping a water balloon). He was right where she thumps the most so he moved to the other side of my belly (where I hardly ever feel her) and started humming. She moved over to him and started thumping him again!!! 
Then yesterday I was holding a co-worker's 2 month old and as soon as I'd get him she would start bouncing around in there (acting angry), I'd hand him off and she'd calm down, get him back and she's bouncing again. She's more my daughter than we thought if she's already getting jealous 
Enough for now. My day felt weird yesterday, between all the realizations and not getting on here for my morning grayness. Today will be better, just on principle.
KK
My date...I really missed this guy, and no it wasn't really romantic or anything. Nothing that would get me in trouble w/ the hubby. I just really miss having him around. We had a big-huge talk (that I blushed through the whole thing) about high school and how he wished me and the hubby would break up and he is still interested. But he likes the hubby and wants me happy so he's going back to Chicago, but will keep in touch better now.
Baby news...She's already Daddy's girl. The other night I was reclining while reading and she'd give a little thump every couple of minutes, just enough for me to feel. He came up put his head on my belly and started humming to her and she started rapidly thumping his cheek
Of course he couldn't feel it, but he heard one big one (said it sounded like somebody thumping a water balloon). He was right where she thumps the most so he moved to the other side of my belly (where I hardly ever feel her) and started humming. She moved over to him and started thumping him again!!! Then yesterday I was holding a co-worker's 2 month old and as soon as I'd get him she would start bouncing around in there (acting angry), I'd hand him off and she'd calm down, get him back and she's bouncing again. She's more my daughter than we thought if she's already getting jealous
Enough for now. My day felt weird yesterday, between all the realizations and not getting on here for my morning grayness. Today will be better, just on principle.
KK
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Baby? I didn't even know you were preggers! I have been gone for a while though. Congrats are in order!