kardez13

wow.
i never knew she thought about it this much.
she talked about it with her best friend....trying to figure out what she should do.
we've been talking since i left.
but always keeping our feelings in Check.
i txt'd her *Island View* once.
that made things interesting.

but yea...
so we've been talking non-stop ever since i left....
now she had this talk with her friend, because it seems she has fallen.


==========
clarissa says:
man.. can i tell you something?
Finding my fallen star... says:
yea dude
Finding my fallen star... says:
you can tell me anything
Finding my fallen star... says:
any secret is safe with me
clarissa says:
i'm sort of torn on somethings
Finding my fallen star... says:
if you trust me then your trust is well placed
Finding my fallen star... says:
like what?
clarissa says:
rj
clarissa says:
and this friend of mine that i met over the summer

don't think i'm the kind of girl to play both guys.. i don't like that
clarissa says:
i'm practially with rj.. and i'm really good friends with this guy..
Finding my fallen star... says:
is it that japanese dude?
clarissa says:
yeah
Finding my fallen star... says:
i see i see
clarissa says:
it's weird....
Finding my fallen star... says:
naw don't worry
Finding my fallen star... says:
anyways go for it man continue
clarissa says:
i really enjoy rj's company & i love hanging out with him
clarissa says:
but i've gotten really close to tadashi & i mean pretty darn close and so fast too..
like i have no problem opening up to him
clarissa says:
but i can't do that with rj.. or not yet
clarissa says:
i could really like this tadashi guy... but i don't want to because for one.. me & rj are practically together
clarissa says:
and i don't want to be some girl that does that. i really like rj.
clarissa says:
but there's a connection with tadashi that me & rj don't have..
clarissa says:
i'm thinking cutting down my communication with tadashi
Finding my fallen star... says:
your heart is obviously with tadashi dude
Finding my fallen star... says:
rj is...
Finding my fallen star... says:
well
Finding my fallen star... says:
someone fun
Finding my fallen star... says:
but...you and I both know that physical things are only skin deep, and connections with people that are on deepers levels ...those are the things that last
Finding my fallen star... says:
i'm not saying rj is a physical thing
Finding my fallen star... says:
but...it just seems that...rj you don't want to ditch because of the circumstances
Finding my fallen star... says:
where as tadashi
Finding my fallen star... says:
you and him seem more like kindred spirits
clarissa says:
i feel like i'm fucked up..
because of how things are between us already.. and i know rj's feelings for me are there...
but i can't open up to him like i can with tadashi.. it's hard..
Finding my fallen star... says:
tadashi is a friend already
Finding my fallen star... says:
good friends you trust
Finding my fallen star... says:
open up to
Finding my fallen star... says:
rj wasn't in that zone to begin with
Finding my fallen star... says:
he was a romantic interest ya know?
Finding my fallen star... says:
it is hard
Finding my fallen star... says:
its not fucked up
Finding my fallen star... says:
but
Finding my fallen star... says:
i think what it is, is that you could possibly be scared to tell him everything
Finding my fallen star... says:
to fully confide in him
clarissa says:
that's the thing..
Finding my fallen star... says:
fear
clarissa says:
it IS hard for me to confide in just about anyone.. even my own sister..
clarissa says:
but tadashi.. just.. broke down my walls
clarissa says:
i don't know how..
clarissa says:
*sigh
Finding my fallen star... says:
well...then thats your answer
Finding my fallen star... says:
who's arms are you more comfortable ni?
Finding my fallen star... says:
in*
Finding my fallen star... says:
who do you think of before you go to sleep at night?
Finding my fallen star... says:
see...one thing i learned is that it is never wrong to feel these feelings
Finding my fallen star... says:
just depends on how you go about and handle the situation
Finding my fallen star... says:
learned that from the situation with jen and i
Finding my fallen star... says:
nothing of what she felt was wrong, but it was everything she did and how she handled it that was wrong
Finding my fallen star... says:
truth is
Finding my fallen star... says:
we can't help how we feel
Finding my fallen star... says:
if you want to be with tadashi then be with him
Finding my fallen star... says:
as for rj
Finding my fallen star... says:
give him what he atleast deserves
Finding my fallen star... says:
and thats the truth
Finding my fallen star... says:
we're all adults
Finding my fallen star... says:
because atleast if you give him the truth
Finding my fallen star... says:
then you guys can still be friends
clarissa says:
i know.. but i feel stupid for taking him this far.. and then just leaving
Finding my fallen star... says:
naw don't
Finding my fallen star... says:
i mean
Finding my fallen star... says:
you're a good person
Finding my fallen star... says:
your feelings are proof of it
Finding my fallen star... says:
be honest
Finding my fallen star... says:
be nice
Finding my fallen star... says:
and he can take it the way he wants it
Finding my fallen star... says:
but at the same time
Finding my fallen star... says:
give some time for the healing
Finding my fallen star... says:
keep things on the DL
clarissa says:
*sigh