I'm a bit in shock and at a loss for words right now. There's no amount of sweet words or gifted writing skills that can express my endless gratitude. @lady @romany @ivylina @jases @Chroi @nickstone @bootlegspm @gadget @xheartswornx @rambo @naru_blu @elune @missy. Everyone! We did this together. So the best I can give you right now, is what I had planned if I ever became an SG. Where this all started, my application & photos.
"WHY I WANT TO BE A SUICIDE GIRL:"
Hello. My name is (Remove for privacy).
I'm greek, hence the strange spelling of my name. Why do I want to be a Suicide Girl? I'm not opposed to becoming a Suicide Girl and I would be extremely flattered and head over heels love to become one, but I can't say it's as important as at least trying the attempt and even as a Hopeful, to truly be me, and share myself with the community.
I was raised in a very strict religious and forced to follow beliefs I didn't accept. Tattoos, nudity, and piercings were evil and you never talk back to the men etc This created a very shy, naive girl. For a large part of my life I lived as a people pleaser, never speaking my own mind and never stepping out of my safezone.
I've also been diagnosed with epilepsy since I was 13 years old. My family refused to talk about it and it was a topic widely avoided in general. This made me feel even less beautiful and more like a freak. In the last year or so, I grew the courage to finally branch out on my own, to actually discover myself. I left a boyfriend I was relatively unhappy with but I stayed because my family insisted I stay with him (religious values).
I've met a wonderful man who loves me and accepts me and all my crazy dreams. I've been socially meek and inapt all my life so I did the most insane and unexpected thing I could. I asked my boyfriend to take me to a very respectable and strict gentleman's club. Obviously I never had been to one before and he brought me to one that's still owned by a former playmate. I was nervous at first but now here I am, a part-time exotic dancer, because to put it simply, if any job is going to break your shell of being antisocial, that's the one.
Now, as for suicide girls, its always been a guilty pleasure of mine, since I learned about them. I just couldn't be open about it. I think the girls are so beautiful and I wanted to be that but just couldn't. Until now. I refused to be anything or anyone less than me anymore. This is who I am and who I want to be. I'm still and always will continue to grow and if fate has that who I become is lucky enough to be an official suicide girl. You damn well believe I'm going to try to be the best SG I can."
So here we are 9 months later. I have met so many wonderful people and so many things have changed. Thank you all for everything. Also as Jennifer lopez would say "I'm still Kaliva from the block" lol
@missy & @rambo
Now back to our regular broadcast my March 2019 Contest is here
You can also take a gander at my recently selected as SOTD A clean start if you haven't seen it by @lady
