So its now been three months on from spliting up with my faincee. How i feel as a person, with help from few true friends and good help for being on anti-depressantes. I am in a much better place now. Finding out that the one you love is a lier a cheater not the person i fall in love with. She telling me loves me but not in love with me hurt alot then her moving back home leaving me here. Where i now live broke me totaly.
If you have read my past post you will understand why it broke me inside. Now three months on am getting back to my self again. Yeah i dont sleep well still waking up every few hours and staying awake for 2 more hours is draining me at work and at home.
Looking back at things has made me think alot, like now i have little turst left after being thrown on the rubbish heap. Worst of it all is am not sure i be able to open up like i did before to love someone truely and fully. Yes its a risk to do so to love someone fully but when u done this time after time with women that you love. It slowly breaks down the person that you are as a person.
Problem is that when u are a kind and caring person coz thats is you to the core being of ur self u start to question ur self about being nice and kind being a gentilmen to women all u get back is hate lies and cheaters. Makes you think why should i be this guy anymore why not become an asshole like most of the guys out their. Just use women and throw them away after u had fun with them. I cant do that its not me
So tonight am going out on my 40th birthday in Lincoln UK with my friends to have a blast