k_belmont

i feel very detached from reality as of late... nothing is making the sort of sense that i am expecting and preferring... with everything i do, i have this shadow beside me that i've created as the me that has everything happen as i imagine it's perfected outcome in my mind to be... each morning i wake up and look back on the night past... and picture how it all could have worked out better... the people that i'd meet from time to time, instead of being who they are and who i am to them, i tend to make attempts in my head to believe that there is always a thick cloud of intrigue in their eyes directed towards me... i am always myself, and i pride in that... i pride in the fact that i never candy coat myself, and never bend truths... i am who i am, and whether they like it or not, i still am... but... that doesn't mean that i can't wish that i was someone else...

i wish i was beautiful, of the type that silences banquet halls upon my entry...

i wish that somewhere, there was someone thinking of me... and often...

i am delving deep...