k_belmont

most people draw lines in their lives that are not meant to be crossed... it seems that anytime that anyone feels a fear of something or another, they draw in imaginary boundary lines, never to return to the cause of that fear... a total mind blocking hindrance of a line... no man can grow when they have caged themselves in, halting all learning and progress of their growth into adulthood... the basic root of fundamentalism is to keep moving that boundary forward... boundaries can be a good thing but you can not grow if they are permanently set in place... they should be used as a temporary respite to heal ones self... just enough to allow us to have another go at it... with each attempt one makes it further through the fire, and sooner or later ends up on the other side with a true feeling of accomplishment... no one achieves results all of a sudden, no one wakes up one day already an adult... lessons are learned one at a time, no man can learn them all at once and make it out alive... the most beneficial lessons in life, are the ones with the most consternating effect... the ones that make you step back and say "oh shit..." and renders your motor skills useless until you figure out how to operate your machine body again... too many times do we all delude ourselves into truths whose line has been drawn prematurely permanent...

i am currently unsure as to why this issue is on my mind... maybe my subconscious wants me to take a particular chance that i've been dreading, maybe it just wants me to take more chances altogether but unparticular as to the nature of... maybe my subconscious wants someone around me to take a chance and i am to inform them of this... either way, i have no idea as to why this topic is on my mind... and thus is why humans create such a passionful interest in me... there is no manual to us, no guidelines that we can follow by... we suddenly think these astounding things and yet have no idea as to the cause... every other creature on this planet has a purpose, and never have they once created anything near as vast as any of the accomplishments of human beings... yet, when it all comes down to it... we can't just step back and see a purpose to all that we do... we all seemingly ignore our prime survival instincts... i may not be religious in nature, but think of this... most religions state that "god" created us in his image... now, take this as you will, as i do not follow a direct belief system, and instead just create my own beliefs... but that right there is my key point, if you read into that statement... god "created" us in his image, and the only purpose that we have on this world that seems self evident is to "create"... think about it... it really is all that we do when it all comes down to it... we accomplish nothing more than to continually "create"... be it a movie, book, electronics, or just a random invention that causes a toy bird to drink from a glass of water... we've even gone as far into trying to push progress of creating along by offering up a prize system for just about everything in this world... nobel prizes, pulitzer prizes, grading systems in schools, etc... we're trying to create so much so rapidly that we bribe each other into accomplishing the mostest bestest the fastest...

i miss you lea... i'm stuck here waxing philosophically and waning intellectually all by my lonesome... i miss our conversations... but it is ok, because when it all comes down to it... i enjoy myself with what i have, and i still am able to continue alleviating my mind, as long as i am able to get it all out in text... even if no one reads it, or cares at all... i care... and i love that i still care...

i am in a very good mood for a change... if you are still with me by this line of text... congratulations... and sorry if i bored you... i write these for me... if you are confused... sorry... weeeeeeeeeee!!!!!