I took my nephew out for a belated 21st birthday celebration last night, I'd had a trying evening at work which concluded with me with my hand in a toilet, I managed to fish out four screws and a spring, I thought this was a crummy end to my night until I heard earlier in the evening the same inmate had a rather large nail removed from inside his asshole...so...in the words of Sterling Archer: "thank god for small miracles." I saw said nail as I was leaving work, it was VERY long for it's housing place and had a curved end, which I presume was for ease of removal, there is a brand new level of determination in certain individuals one encounters in a jail, it's hard not to begrudgingly admire it for it's tenacity. Anyhoo, my newly 21 year old nephew is not well accustomed to the drink so I eased him in with Captain Morgan and Dr Pepper. He did an okay job with his drinks, but apparently wound up throwing up after I returned him home, so it goes. It was not my goal to make the poor lad ill, but I hope he had an okay time prior to vomiting, which is rarely if ever a good time. I guess the ultimate point of my story is that while I was a young lad when my nephew was born, having a 21 year old nephew, whose birth you remember kinda sorta makes you a little bit, by definition, like an old turd.
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