julieruin

I wonder if sometimes I should just stop thinking about things... I'm always very distracted... its like a character trait of mine.
Sometimes my new co-workers are just soo comfortable saying pretty much anything, that it makes me feel uncomfortable. My boss gave one of my co-workers the finger as he left today.. that was pretty funny... I think it was in front of a patient too. I just don't feel comfortable with how they make fun of some of the patients sometimes... and just saying really mean things about them.... so I say somthing to them because I feel its bad karma and I don't like hearing it. On the flip side I don't want to seem like I'm on a high horse, and make them feel uncomfortable around me.
Anyways, I baked an apple pie with my "bff" last night. I really like her.. she was talking about how we 'click' and how she feels she 'gets me'. I don't even have to say anything and she knows what I mean. I really like hanging out with her but at the same time it can really suck too. Sucky just because I want her close, I want her smile right up agaisnt mine. I wish we would 'click' on more levels... like lego... and maybe make a cool snappy sound. Or perhaps not snappy :S haha
She's a super fun awsome friend, and she says she would be really upset if we weren't friends... and all this stuff... But sometimes it kills me to feel so close but no cigar. Sometimes I feel bad, like I'm being selfish or a big horny lesbian. I try not to be. *sigh* I really shouldn't have slept with her in her ex boyfriend's bed :s