The Canary Project
Throughout history people with bad haircuts have made bad decisions, Hitler, Napoleon, Nixon, Trump etc. Why? They were too consumed by vanity to focus on doing the right thing. As a life-long representative and wearer of bad haircuts, I have lost, in total, months off of my life due to countless individual moments of Mirror-Checking, Finger-Tined-Combing, Tussling, & playing a game I like to call How many different Materials can I see my own reflection in? (For the record its 19.5) When I finally get it to a length Im happy with, one that allows versatility for different styles etc, I get possessed by a demon called Mr Snips. Never, ever leave a person with slight OCD alone with a pair of.well anything really. My mother has found me many times in situations even more awkward than the usual being-caught-with-pants-down scenario one would expect. Eg The Purple Eyebrows Incident (See previous entries), but she has always been understanding of my obsessive vanity, in fact she may have been the one to instil It in me.
The irony of all this, of course, is that had I just left it alone, I would have eventually achieved the aesthetic goal I had set out for. But when Mr Snips takes hold he doesnt let go easily. Powered by the thousands of individual evil hair strands, like some kind of secular Ashi Magari like Head Tentacles obeying Snips every whim; it starts off as a single thought Just one Snip. But of course cutting or sometimes even moving one strand changes the entire foundations of the way I see myself. Like some kind of Head Feng Shui, my hair fucks with my self esteem on a daily basis. Ive often thought shaving my head would liberate me from this prison of Epidermis, but would just leave me lookinguntrustworthy. All one can do is endure the growing pains. As such, so began the Challenge, under the guidance/advice of my new magical fringed friend:
24 hours without looking or touching my hair.
I lasted less than 5 minutes
Throughout history people with bad haircuts have made bad decisions, Hitler, Napoleon, Nixon, Trump etc. Why? They were too consumed by vanity to focus on doing the right thing. As a life-long representative and wearer of bad haircuts, I have lost, in total, months off of my life due to countless individual moments of Mirror-Checking, Finger-Tined-Combing, Tussling, & playing a game I like to call How many different Materials can I see my own reflection in? (For the record its 19.5) When I finally get it to a length Im happy with, one that allows versatility for different styles etc, I get possessed by a demon called Mr Snips. Never, ever leave a person with slight OCD alone with a pair of.well anything really. My mother has found me many times in situations even more awkward than the usual being-caught-with-pants-down scenario one would expect. Eg The Purple Eyebrows Incident (See previous entries), but she has always been understanding of my obsessive vanity, in fact she may have been the one to instil It in me.
The irony of all this, of course, is that had I just left it alone, I would have eventually achieved the aesthetic goal I had set out for. But when Mr Snips takes hold he doesnt let go easily. Powered by the thousands of individual evil hair strands, like some kind of secular Ashi Magari like Head Tentacles obeying Snips every whim; it starts off as a single thought Just one Snip. But of course cutting or sometimes even moving one strand changes the entire foundations of the way I see myself. Like some kind of Head Feng Shui, my hair fucks with my self esteem on a daily basis. Ive often thought shaving my head would liberate me from this prison of Epidermis, but would just leave me lookinguntrustworthy. All one can do is endure the growing pains. As such, so began the Challenge, under the guidance/advice of my new magical fringed friend:
24 hours without looking or touching my hair.
I lasted less than 5 minutes