Oh, the promises I made to keep in close touch and my first update is offensively belated. Never had I imagined all that's involved in relocating just one state to the south. Literally, there's been nearly two month involved, and I'm moving again next month. Here are some questions you might have for me if we were talking in the real 3-D world.
HOW ARE YOU?....WHERE ARE YOU LIVING?
Nine out of ten. The reason I don't say ten is because today is the very first day I have nothing to do. I'm living temporarily right smack dab in the middle of Gaytown West Hollywood, where men love men openly and whole-heartedly. (This is great considering I can jog in the scantily of clad without enduring awkward jog-by advances.) I'm in a two-hundred square-foot apartment that is lopsided and charming as a 1920's telephone.
This place has rent control and is a thousand dollars a month. HAHAHHAHAHAHHA! Hahhahaha. Heheoh. Ah, yes. I can say my neighbors are multi-millionaires and us folks in the complex are lower-lower class compared to our Sweetzer Avenue resident counterparts. Next month, a savior-friend is passing on to me his bigger, much much much cheaper, and jaw-droppingly beautiful studio. It's right up in the hills by that ugly Hollywood signage, and for that, we owe him big time. Check it out:
CALIFORNIA TAX PAYER DOLLARS, GO! DON'T YOU HATE IT?
The 8% sales tax here will make any x-Oregonian puke up a bit, but after visiting the libraries and other public parks around, I can honestly say I'm happy to pay that and more. It really is a bit like a Caligulan paradise with beautiful lawns (thanks to LA's ruthless abduction of Northern California's water supply), creepily healthy people, and amazing free things to do every night of the week. I do believe I can count I've been to five comedy shows, two concerts and five library events. There is food available around every corner, cheap delivery of anything you want, and a store specially in business for the most particular of products. Looking for a jump rope store? Check. Does your privileged dog need a colonic? Check. Maybe you want a peacock-themed clock? Check.
In coming months I have friends relocating here. The person that helped me move my stuff and drive the truck down here, Jeff, has been hypnotized by Los Angeles' charm as well: (I think it was a night at the Dresden and free jazz that did it). Also, Kristian is coming down to begin a lucrative contact of some rich-people proportions. I do miss the thoroughly familiar and historical faces too.
AREN'T THE PEOPLE CREEPY?
Yes. Totally. There are characters here that I couldn't even dream up if I took a bunch of Benedryl before bed. Luckily, I was prepared for them to be even meaner and lamer, so it brings a sigh of relief (even as my lunch mate may shamelessly poke away at their Blackberry in between every bite and/or won't stop talking about the Tootsie Roll commercial call-back). I can be a bit of a self-concerned go-getter myself, and here it's okay to express that openly. Great! The other side of me is a complete contrarian, who battles whatever fixed environment I am in. So, here I feel a bit of a kinder, softer, more Buddhist Jenna.
Albeit, there are the Hollyweirds, I can also say that other folks roaming this sprawled city, just like me, have come here because they are looking for something that wasn't in reach before. Motivation required to relocate to one of the scariest and daunting places in America takes some gall, and these brazen individuals tend to be bright, intelligent, and full of spark. A charming lady comedian I met the other day fascinated my socks off within five minutes with a story of a Skull'n'Bones break-in at Yale. Hows that for cocktail conversation? I've met the famous folks, the struggling geniuses, and those that are simply risking it all for a chance to show what makes them special. It's invigorating and encouraging to meet such individuals around every corner. Suddenly I feel a little smaller and less self-righteous in this world, and I'm so happy to do so.
Yes, yes I've met some famous folks. Sadly, after a week or so of being here, it's just not that big a deal. I found Tracy Lords in my friend's kitchen when I went to get some orange juice (no joke), Michael Cera (cute kid from Arrested Development), and Bob Odenkirk. There are some others that are dear to my heart in obscure Indie pockets of comedy that you wouldn't care about. Blah blah blah.
HOW ARE YOU?....WHERE ARE YOU LIVING?
Nine out of ten. The reason I don't say ten is because today is the very first day I have nothing to do. I'm living temporarily right smack dab in the middle of Gaytown West Hollywood, where men love men openly and whole-heartedly. (This is great considering I can jog in the scantily of clad without enduring awkward jog-by advances.) I'm in a two-hundred square-foot apartment that is lopsided and charming as a 1920's telephone.
This place has rent control and is a thousand dollars a month. HAHAHHAHAHAHHA! Hahhahaha. Heheoh. Ah, yes. I can say my neighbors are multi-millionaires and us folks in the complex are lower-lower class compared to our Sweetzer Avenue resident counterparts. Next month, a savior-friend is passing on to me his bigger, much much much cheaper, and jaw-droppingly beautiful studio. It's right up in the hills by that ugly Hollywood signage, and for that, we owe him big time. Check it out:
CALIFORNIA TAX PAYER DOLLARS, GO! DON'T YOU HATE IT?
The 8% sales tax here will make any x-Oregonian puke up a bit, but after visiting the libraries and other public parks around, I can honestly say I'm happy to pay that and more. It really is a bit like a Caligulan paradise with beautiful lawns (thanks to LA's ruthless abduction of Northern California's water supply), creepily healthy people, and amazing free things to do every night of the week. I do believe I can count I've been to five comedy shows, two concerts and five library events. There is food available around every corner, cheap delivery of anything you want, and a store specially in business for the most particular of products. Looking for a jump rope store? Check. Does your privileged dog need a colonic? Check. Maybe you want a peacock-themed clock? Check.
In coming months I have friends relocating here. The person that helped me move my stuff and drive the truck down here, Jeff, has been hypnotized by Los Angeles' charm as well: (I think it was a night at the Dresden and free jazz that did it). Also, Kristian is coming down to begin a lucrative contact of some rich-people proportions. I do miss the thoroughly familiar and historical faces too.
AREN'T THE PEOPLE CREEPY?
Yes. Totally. There are characters here that I couldn't even dream up if I took a bunch of Benedryl before bed. Luckily, I was prepared for them to be even meaner and lamer, so it brings a sigh of relief (even as my lunch mate may shamelessly poke away at their Blackberry in between every bite and/or won't stop talking about the Tootsie Roll commercial call-back). I can be a bit of a self-concerned go-getter myself, and here it's okay to express that openly. Great! The other side of me is a complete contrarian, who battles whatever fixed environment I am in. So, here I feel a bit of a kinder, softer, more Buddhist Jenna.
Albeit, there are the Hollyweirds, I can also say that other folks roaming this sprawled city, just like me, have come here because they are looking for something that wasn't in reach before. Motivation required to relocate to one of the scariest and daunting places in America takes some gall, and these brazen individuals tend to be bright, intelligent, and full of spark. A charming lady comedian I met the other day fascinated my socks off within five minutes with a story of a Skull'n'Bones break-in at Yale. Hows that for cocktail conversation? I've met the famous folks, the struggling geniuses, and those that are simply risking it all for a chance to show what makes them special. It's invigorating and encouraging to meet such individuals around every corner. Suddenly I feel a little smaller and less self-righteous in this world, and I'm so happy to do so.
Yes, yes I've met some famous folks. Sadly, after a week or so of being here, it's just not that big a deal. I found Tracy Lords in my friend's kitchen when I went to get some orange juice (no joke), Michael Cera (cute kid from Arrested Development), and Bob Odenkirk. There are some others that are dear to my heart in obscure Indie pockets of comedy that you wouldn't care about. Blah blah blah.
VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
Nicely written up synopisis of a move.
I read your las blog and your account of los angeles is oh so accurate. despite your best efforts, it sort of worms its way into your heart.
if you haven't yet, you should read some of joan didion's essays on la. and mike davis' city of quartz.
it's a complicated, nuanced city with a crazy history. the chandlers, the water wars, noir- what more could you ask for!