There's a dessert that goes by the name Dirt. Wheb I make it, I use a layer of chocolate cake, a layer of chocolate pudding, a layer of whipped cream and a layer of Skor chocolate bars. I tell all of you this because when I say "The Dukes of Hazzard movie was dirt", I want you to know I'm actually giving it quite the compliment. I took the 10 dollars I had left over from the travisty that was my bar going experience last night and invested it in, what I hoped to be, a halfway decent movie experience. What I got was dirt. For starters, this was a Broken Lizard movie. I could leave it at that and it would be well worth the 6.75 early bird ticket. The script was good, the direction was great, the film score was fantastic and the cameos were fun to spot... all of which stems from being associated with the Broken Lizard crew (there was even a nice little Super Troopers reference). That's not all though. The stunts were awesome not only for the fact that a car jumping things is awesome in and of itself, but also because (as it was pointed out to me by my friend Brian) they could very easily be done in regular life, which was all topped off with rally racing speckeled through the whole movie. The acting was pretty frigging fantastic. Knoxville and Scott were hilarious as the duke boys, Willie Nelson was in it enough to recognize but not enough to suck, Burt Reynolds is the motherfucking Bandit (teflon), Jessica Simpson wasn't horrible but deffinitely hot, and even all the secondary actors were good enough for top billing. Take all that info and you have got yourselves one hell of a good movie. This movie is a base 7 out of 10, minus 1 for no nudity, but plus 2 for the blooper reel during the credits.
8 out of 10
That's all I did with my day. Tomorrow is another lazy day. Sunday I have to go out with Janet and my brother, but could probably scam 20 bucks from her so I can go see March of the Penguins... er... I mean... um... aw, fuck it. Those baby penguins are fucking adorable. After that is monday... my first day of work.
8 out of 10
That's all I did with my day. Tomorrow is another lazy day. Sunday I have to go out with Janet and my brother, but could probably scam 20 bucks from her so I can go see March of the Penguins... er... I mean... um... aw, fuck it. Those baby penguins are fucking adorable. After that is monday... my first day of work.
VIEW 7 of 7 COMMENTS
Cool, it's a cut and paste, but here is the invite I am sending people:
Hello all, if you have the time and the inclination, please consider joining us in a day of adventure at the Glacial Potholes of Shelburne Falls.
What are these "Potholes" you ask?
In Shelburne Falls, Massachusetts there is a dammed river, the bed of which consists of mammoth slabs of stone. During the ice ages, rocks ranging from pebbles to boulders were picked up by the ice and carried over the stone river bed. Through the forces of time, tide and pressure, these rocks were drilled into the underlying layer of stone, creating smooth and symmetrical holes of all sizes visible to all due to the dam holding back the river.
Add to that natural wonder a raging waterfall, craggy precipices to jump from, slippery moss to slip on and NO municipal supervision and what do you get? A Hell of a time, that's what!
But wait, there's more!
"What more could you add?" you ask? "How could this possibly get any better/more absurd?" you posit?
Well, the icing on this particular cake is the sign at the top of the dam. The sign that warns menacingly: "Sudden surge of water when horn sounds and light flashes, leave the area at once". You see, the billions of gallons of water are held back by little more than an aging system of planks and beams. I don't know if or when this happens, but if the aforementioned surge of water were to occur and one was recreating in the gulley at the bottom of the waterfall, one would be hard pressed to scramble back up to safety before being swept up by a rush of water rivaled only by that spot of bother Noah is said to have dealt with.
So you see, the whole deal is ludicrously dangerous!
I can't believe I dare to further pad this hyperbolic invitation, but if you are the rebellious type, you will be happy to know folks aren't actually allowed to enter the vicinity of the Potholes! The entire area was closed to the public a few years ago, but I have recently discovered that throngs of people still enjoy the deadly fun on a daily basis. The main point of access is locked, but enterprising thrill seekers (including little old ladies with beach chairs) simply walked around the corner and continued to partake of the inviting peril. (as thrill seekers are wont to do) If all of the above wasn't enough for you, the possibility of forced eviction by The Man also adds to the fun!
So if you feel up to it and you have Saturday, 8/20 free, please drop me a line. We will gather here at my house first, then convoy up to Shelburne Falls with bathing suits, coolers and sandwiches. Bring the Kids! Bring the pets! (please don't bring your pets)
See: http://www.shelburnefalls.com/attractpages/glacial.html
for more info.
Thank you