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jordyn

Santa Cruz

Member Since 2002

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Wednesday May 25, 2005

May 25, 2005
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First day of the rest of my life. Graduation morning.


Longerish post:

There it was, I graduated. What to do now? When I was younger, I don't know what I thought, maybe that one day I would be smacked upside the head with all the answers and that I would know the way of the universe. But here I am, 22, asking myself the same question I asked when I was 5, 'where does the universe end? that question has always induced in me a sense of fearful awe. It's a simple question I know, yet here on the edge of "grown-up" life, it takes on being more than a question.

Where does the universe end? What defines a universe? Your universe? Does my universe, end here and now as I leave college or will the past present and future, merge to be my ultimate universe.

Yesterday when I woke up, I looked in the mirror, the past weeks festivities manifesting in my morning face. After a drawn-out hangover stand in the shower, while brushing my teeth, I saw my new face. I don't know when it happened, when I grew up. The face that had gotten me thru college, was no longer there. Scanning I felt the line of my nose the contour of my brow; everything was as it should be everything in the right place. But it was different. With one swift movement and less than a passing thought, viola, there it was. I was staring at Jenn version 3.0.

During my relatively very short life, I thought that I had been traveling along a very trying and confusing road, that I had been dealt an unfair card. As I look now, I am thankful for the trials that I've been through. I was blessed with chance to experience things early, and be able to reflect when there is still so much ahead of me.

Don't be confused, responsibility and knowledge does not equate to stiffness or lack of excitement. I will always love live music, I will always enjoy a good time in good company, and odd hours of the day.

Later in the day while hanging out with a close friend that is younger than me, I saw some of trials that she has and saw that, though we all handle and deal with things differently, at some point in our life we will have to learn. I have a sister and a very good very close best girl friend, but none the less she has let me the opportunity to be the big sister, to be able to share my experience with someone who with benefit from it.

The universe is big, unimaginably enormous, and thats the point. Take in the possibilities that could lie with in that vast space of the future, and the ones that lie within the present.

I am unclear of where I will lead myself to, but you better be sure that when I reflect on my 5 college years, I will remember the warmth that I encountered, the joy I shared, and the optimism I was filled with when I look at my peers.
VIEW 9 of 9 COMMENTS
jjay:
word.

i got more questions than answers but I'm more excited to be alive than ever
Jun 18, 2005
hoaxoner:
are you seriously in Hanalei. hello from the otherside of the island!!!!!
Jun 30, 2005

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