I am very tired, content and happy. Life is so surprising sometimes...I hope the Universe will let me enjoy this new experience.
It's an amazing feeling and I am taking it day by day, revelling in the beauty of it and the discoveries of the heart, mind, spirit and soul.
I am melting into another form. Maybe I will soon no longer be IceAndStone, after all.
Sigh....
(edit, 4:50pm) More.......
So, I looked back at my last few entries and realized that emotionally, I've been a roller-coaster. Jeez!
I guess I needed to go through all that to come out on the other side.
I'm not "angry" at The Visitor anymore. I just feel sad. I recently got to tell him the things that I wanted to, and therefore, no matter what the outcome has been since then, I feel a sense of closure. When I think of him now, it is like it happened in another life to another version of myself. I know he won't call anymore, even though he said he would., but I still wish him the best and hope he can allow himself to find happiness somewhere inside himself. I hope he can learn to forgive his own heart and let it open to the world again.
I can't believe I am still at work right now. My shift ended at 3:30pm, but I feel such a lazy peacefulness, that I feel in no rush to leave. It's nice to take advantage of the DSL here instead of having to use my dial-up at home.
I cannot wait to go home and walk the dog, feed the cats and then finally, for the first time in weeks TAKE A NAP! I can't imagine anything more wonderful right now (except if the Baby was there too -
) than to curl up and snooze. I know that after I get some REM in my brain, I will feel even more centered and serene. Ahhhh.....
Now if I just had food in the house, I would be completely satisfied. How often have I come close to feeling that? Not very.
I miss all of you that I am close with. I will post, etc. to you soon. Much
and a million
to you. PLEASE wish me good energy. I don't want what I'm feeling to end.
Meow....
It's an amazing feeling and I am taking it day by day, revelling in the beauty of it and the discoveries of the heart, mind, spirit and soul.
I am melting into another form. Maybe I will soon no longer be IceAndStone, after all.
Sigh....
(edit, 4:50pm) More.......
So, I looked back at my last few entries and realized that emotionally, I've been a roller-coaster. Jeez!
I guess I needed to go through all that to come out on the other side.
I'm not "angry" at The Visitor anymore. I just feel sad. I recently got to tell him the things that I wanted to, and therefore, no matter what the outcome has been since then, I feel a sense of closure. When I think of him now, it is like it happened in another life to another version of myself. I know he won't call anymore, even though he said he would., but I still wish him the best and hope he can allow himself to find happiness somewhere inside himself. I hope he can learn to forgive his own heart and let it open to the world again.
I can't believe I am still at work right now. My shift ended at 3:30pm, but I feel such a lazy peacefulness, that I feel in no rush to leave. It's nice to take advantage of the DSL here instead of having to use my dial-up at home.
I cannot wait to go home and walk the dog, feed the cats and then finally, for the first time in weeks TAKE A NAP! I can't imagine anything more wonderful right now (except if the Baby was there too -
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Now if I just had food in the house, I would be completely satisfied. How often have I come close to feeling that? Not very.
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I miss all of you that I am close with. I will post, etc. to you soon. Much
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Meow....
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VIEW 17 of 17 COMMENTS
farsight00:
very glad to see your world has become better, jora. life is indeed surprising. we should never forget this whenever the darkest shadows fall...
farsight00:
you're most welcome
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