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jora

Reno, NV

Member Since 2002

Followers 108 Following 81

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Thursday Jun 19, 2003

Jun 19, 2003
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Today was weird. I felt weird, but in a good way. I am off work today and tomorrow for vacation and normally, I'd just sleep for two days, But I somehow (through the magical meds?) became a productive person and cleaned my house, went clothes shopping (which I usually HATE doing), went to lunch, visited a friend in need and then got a massage. Through all of this, I had no panic attack or feelings of self-hatred. This is puzzling. Dare I say it, I think I may have been in a "good mood", which I now know feels a lot different than manic. Odd. Is it possible that I can live a somewhat normal life? Well, normal for me, you know? I am experiencing a miracle? It almost feels like it. Anything that can allow me to focus my brain long enough to write (poetry and prose) again, is a wonderful thing.

But, I am still in need of distraction. Still have that short attention span. surreal

Thanks to everyone who answered my last entry. It means a lot. So often people don't extend themselves to care, get involved, whatever, and the truth is - that's the whole point. That and love...and art...and truth... and freedom... and humor... okay, so a lot matters. But that is new to me too. Nothing used to matter. Now things are waking up inside me that I thought were gone.

So...... that's that.

jora33 miao!!
miloryan:
Kick ass Jora33! I know that feeling of thinking you just might actually be in a good mood but it seems unfamiliar. Anyway keep it going and thanks for your reply.
Jun 19, 2003
schleprock:
Congratulation on feeling better. From what I have been led to believe what you are experiencign is the way most people act all the time. I don't get it either. I figured everyone had to fight to get where they were going.

I would blame your short attention span on your cats rubbing off on you.

Damn, I guess I missed my golden oppurtunity with the pick-up lines. Eyes don't work for me, I am too unobservent to notice them. I have to be wacked with a stick.
Jun 20, 2003

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