Hey kids, here's something fun and embarresing! So we all know the Frank Zappa song 'Why Does it Hurt When I Pee?' right? About all the fun VD a touring musician can get. Well I am no musician and I don't think I have VD (had some chalamydia in college but that's anotehr embarresing story) but for a week now it has fucking burned when I take a leak. It seems to be a bladder infection but since I have been 'part time' at my work for a while I have no insurance so I have been trying to take care of it with lots of hydration and leaving the old wang alone.
Unfortunately at the same time I am traveling for work all the time and stressed out on a project so I think it is tending to get worse. It burns a bit less when I whiz but today I think my lymph nodes have been swollen and sore in my crotch and I am constantly paranoid it will get worse and I will have a fever or go sterile or something.
The upshot is I need to get some antibiotics but I don't want to spend a dime more than I have to to get a diagnosis that will just match what I allready know. Wish I lived in Canada.
The worst part is not the feeling of having my junk hooked up to a car battery when I whiz however. It's that I can't fuck!! Or beat it!! I can't remember the last time I have gone without since I was 10 years old and figured how to do it. This has lead me to realize that I live for poon-tang. I'm ready to beg my girl to give her head just so I can wallow in it for a while. I could probably work the same dumb job for the rest of my life and do the same meaningless hobbies and puttering around and be totaly happy so long as I get plentiful naked ladies and a wet pussy to schlup often as I can.
Does that make me shallow? Or just self-aware?
Either way, pray for my sore junk and sacrife a few chickens while yer at it, I need all the help I can get!
Unfortunately at the same time I am traveling for work all the time and stressed out on a project so I think it is tending to get worse. It burns a bit less when I whiz but today I think my lymph nodes have been swollen and sore in my crotch and I am constantly paranoid it will get worse and I will have a fever or go sterile or something.
The upshot is I need to get some antibiotics but I don't want to spend a dime more than I have to to get a diagnosis that will just match what I allready know. Wish I lived in Canada.
The worst part is not the feeling of having my junk hooked up to a car battery when I whiz however. It's that I can't fuck!! Or beat it!! I can't remember the last time I have gone without since I was 10 years old and figured how to do it. This has lead me to realize that I live for poon-tang. I'm ready to beg my girl to give her head just so I can wallow in it for a while. I could probably work the same dumb job for the rest of my life and do the same meaningless hobbies and puttering around and be totaly happy so long as I get plentiful naked ladies and a wet pussy to schlup often as I can.
Does that make me shallow? Or just self-aware?
Either way, pray for my sore junk and sacrife a few chickens while yer at it, I need all the help I can get!
VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
pajamamama:
Yep Cranberry juice is supposed to help. Hope you feel better. Thanks for you nice comment! 
cassy:
baby bladder infs are the fucking WORST, and unfortunately the only thing that will get rid of that shit is antibiotics, go pay the 150.00 for them, it's worth it....jesus i'd pay 500.00 for them when i have a bladder inf, it's no joke. and uristat is right, take that makes you pee bright orange, and basically it just minimizes the pain but it doesn't kill any bacteria, you need ab's for that baby. i hope you feel better 