johnnyfive

i must be in a phase or something. maybe on my male menstration cycle or something because i sent an email to an ex today and told her to "take her one hundred dollar dildo and go to new york and fuck yourself" upon hearing she had bought a $100 dildo and was going to nyc. and i told another that "i wish we could be on good terms but at this point i am having a hard time giving a shit."

i feel like it's justified. there's more to each story, i'm only including the punchlines, but fuck 'em. they don't deserve stories. you know who deserves a story?!? DABNEY MUTHERFUCKIN COLEMAN!!!

nah, but seriously, i was so pissed off yesterday, so frustrated, that i just had this overwhelming feeling of defeat. like i was looking at my dirty floor and thinking " i should really sweep this up" and then thinking "fuck it. it gets dirlty immediately afterwards. as soon as the door opens, people track debris in and you can littlerally see the fur flying off of toby each time he scratches himself". i dunno. that's the best i can do to describe it. it just made me want to sit in my blue room under my blue disco ball (yes, i have a blue room and a blue disco ball) under the air conditioning and in front of cable tv. so i fell asleep while bad movies went off and on...like night shift, chariman of the board (with carrottop), parents, weekend at bernies, and countless others. i even think another stakeout came on, but that could have been a bad dream.