jennrose

yesterday i went up to Chameleon's, and i just got home like an hour ago. it was fun. i spent most of it watching chameleon and Freon play resident evil 4. it's a cool game. ada is hot lol. though i think i'm spoiled by games like doa, because the thought that kept going through my head when i watched her was, "she's hot, but i wish i got to see more bounciness." haha awful, but true. anyway, i got to see them unlock the hand cannon and the chicago typewriter. fucking awesome weapons. the amount of damage the hand cannon does is just sick. it's so damn powerful, it's insane. if i played the game, i'd wanna play it on their saves, that way i could just blast through the game with those weapons. i loved it in parasite eve, in the ex game, once i got the super tool, i made the sickest weapon... oh it was soooo fucking beautiful... it was so insanely powerful... i just blasted through enemies and the end boss like they were nothin'. *goes into parasite eve nostalgia mode*

i go into nostalgia over parasite eve way too much... but sometimes i do miss that game... it was so much fun when i played it.

since i talked about resident evil, i so have to link to this penny arcade comic. i don't care if my linking penny arcade gets old, that strip is hilarious.

oh, and i got freon and chameleon to read a couple of my most recent short stories. there's some editing i need to do, now... sigh. editing is such a pain. figuring out what works and what doesnt after i've written something can be difficult. and sometimes it's difficult to keep the flow of the story from getting effed up when i go back and change stuff. stupid flow. also, it's difficult sometimes to motivate myself to edit something, because i know it's gonna be time-consuming and at least semi-painful. since i'll be snowed in this weekend, i think, maybe i can force myself to do some editing. fun fun.

i think i do go into buffy withdrawl when i don't watch it for too long. i got home and was like, "i feel like watching buffy." and that urge wouldn't go away. so now i'm watching the series finale. wee! for dvds.

there's a little exerpt from the series finale of buffy: tvs that i really feel like quoting here, because it really sums up a lot of what's been going on in my life lately in that really amusing way only buffy-talk can...

buffy: i'm well aware of my stellar history with guys... you know, in the midst of all this insanity, a couple things are actually starting to make sense. and the guy thing i always feared there was something wrong with me, you know, because i couldn't make it work. but maybe i'm not supposed to.
angel: because you're the slayer?
buffy: because ok, i'm cookie dough. i'm not done baking. i'm not finished becoming whoever the hell it is i'm gonna turn out to be. i make it through this, and the next thing, and the next thing, and maybe one day i turn around and realize i'm ready. i'm cookies. and then, you know, if i want someone to eat or enjoy warm, delicious cookie me, then...that's fine. that'll be then. when i'm done.
angel: any thoughts on who might enjoy do i have to go with the cookie analogy?
buffy: i'm not really thinking that far ahead. that's kind of the point.
~ buffy:tvs, "chosen"

that dialogue rocks. and it really does rather suit my whole life-situation as of late. because, you know, i've decided to be single and stay single for a while, to try to figure some stuff out about myself, to let myself develop without letting myself cling to someone or be dependent on someone. i'm not done becoming me yet, and until i'm done, i can't have a truly healthy, happy, and long-term relationship with another person. i'm not ready for it. ah, the philosophy of buffy. cookie dough! wee! lol.