jeckyl

Hello everybunny, it's been a while.

I haven't been AWOL, I'm on the site for at least an hour everyday, I just struggle to think of cheerful things to write about because I'm not in the most cheerful of places in my life right now.

I finished my exams on Thusday all of which I failed because I couldn't stop crying long enough to actually study.
I don't think "depression" is even the right word for this anymore.

ANYWAY, enough about that!!

Did you all see Tarion FP yesterday?? It's been SO long since we had an SA girl FP, it was really exciting for me! Especially since I'm such a huge Tarion fan!!

At some point I'll get around to giving you all an update on my life but I really just.. Well I'd rather not right now.

Instead, I'm going to talk to you all about my hair.
Yes, my hair.
(I would like to now submit "Hair" as well as "Food" to the Powers That Govern for consideration to be added to the list of categories for blogs. Thank you.)

Over the years I have done very many unspeakable things to my hair and it surprises me that I still have any left.
It seems my inability to commit extends into my appearance and this has seen me spawn a great multitude of hair styles and colors and combinations that would make any sane human squirm.

So, without any further adieu, Jeckyl Suicide's hair timeline..

Once upon a six years ago, I was just a normal teenager, doing normal teenager things and having normal teenager problems(and hair)...


Normal Teenager Jeckyl

The transformation all started in my third of High School when I discovered this horrid trend known at the time as "Emo".

The first change was the fringe. My teachers referred to it as "the curtain".
To this day, I can't tell you how I saw through this thing for 3 years.


Emo Jeckyl going to school with a ridiculously over-sized bow in her hair

The first colour I put in my hair was actually from a can of hairspray and I was convinced it made me look pretty damn hardcore..


Hardcore Jeckyl

Of course then I discovered clip-in hair extensions and it all just went downhill from there.
I started doing combo's with black.
(Please note the evolution, or de-evolution rather, of my dress sense)

And then, bless them, they decided to let me out of High School.

Without the constraints of school rules, I was now free to do with my hair whatever my little neon heart desired.
It dawned upon me that two colors was no longer enough!

This began the three-tone-craze..
(Again, God, those accessories. WHY)

It started kinda tame..

Now, as you can see, we have entered the scene-hair phase of my life.
The motto here was "The bigger the hair, the closer to God". I read that quote somewhere and decided to swear by it.
In an attempt to outdo.. well.. myself, even three colors was no longer enough!
I give you the abridged version of the darkest year of my life.

You might recognize this pic from the pageant I told you about, the night that launched my career.



Immediately, my style completely shifted.
Through my photo-shoots, I learned to drastically tone down my garish ways. The change was instantaneous.

And as time went on, and as I grew into, on, and through this site, and as my career progressed, I found myself changing more and more..

Okay, so now I'm usually wearing less clothes than I used to..



But, when I DO wear clothes, they're pretty damn classy



I went through a green phase somewhere along the line..



That was around the time I shot Enviable



I got in touch with my playful side when I shot
SuicideGirls For Dummies



But then, I'm proud to say, I went back to my natural unnaturally black hair. And I've actually kept it for over a year!!

All these changes I think can account for the more mature feel people say they get from my latest set Sublimate




The only change I've made since then is go shorter with my hair



And then shorter still..




I won't pretend to understand the reasoning behind the way I used to be. But, if I had to hazard a guess, I'd say I went through most of my life feeling like I was invisible.
I just wanted to be noticed, I wanted to stand out.
That's why I always had to have more piercings, more jewelry, more color. Because otherwise I felt like I'd just disappear.
But now I've realized that I don't need all of that for people to see me.
They see me fine just the way I am.
And I've lost that need I feel to always be more. I feel just as comfortable now to be natural as I did then to have all that sparkle around me.
And I think this is one of the many things I attribute to my joining this site.
Realizing that hey, even just Jeckyl minus all the frills, is still pretty cool.

So thank you once again, SG, for the very many ways in which you enrich our lives, without even realizing it.


New Jeckyl!

I hope you've all enjoyed my little hair timeline.

Until we meet again, I love you all!!