I wanted to make a blog today because as of today it's been exactly one year since I've had a set go FP.
Yay me.
Anyway, I didn't know what to write about because I've been paralysingly depressed as of late and my day pretty much consists of either crying, sulking, or pretending to eat so my mother will leave me alone.
But then I saw this in my NewsFeed on FaceBook.
I'd like to take a moment to dissect this.
Firstly I too do get messages from girls asking me about the site.
I give them facts. I pretty much have a copy/paste reply that I send. It goes like this:
"Hi,
Thank you so much for showing interest in the becoming a SuicideGirl!
I would love to help you!
First, a bit about the site:
SiuicideGirls is the world's largest online modelling website featuring thousands upon thousands of pinup photo's from alternative models from all over the world.
To become one, all you have to do is apply. Follow the link below and fill out the application form, be sure to attach 3 CLEAR pics of yourself. They don't have to be proffessional. They just want an idea of what you look like.
They should get back to you within 3 weeks. When they do, inbox me again and I will help you through the second phase of application. Good luck!!
P.S I should mention that this is a nude pinup site and, as such, you will be expected to pose fully nude in all of your sets. This is not optional. If you are hesitant or unsure, just let me know and I will forward you a few sample pics. I can assure you that the nudity is very tastefully and artfully done. Nothing overly graphic or sexual. And you don't have to show your fanny if you don't want to. Just boobs and bum."
(And any Hopeful or SG on this site who asked me for help can attest to the authenticity of this message. It really is what I send them.)
See, just facts. I don't think it's my place to sway a girl's decision either way. Even though I'd really love to just scream "APPLY APPLY APPLY!!".
Nobody pushed me into this. I won't push anyone else into it. Or out of it.
I don't knpw what this girl's experience with the site is but I don't think it's fair to make the rest of us look and feel like idiots for sticking around.
Anyway a status like this is catnip for someone who's in as foul a mood as I am so here's my analysis. Line by line.
"You will be treated like complete shit by the staff, your contract will keep you in bondage (and not in a good way), you will be ignored and heckled and it will be a blemish on your career, should you continue to model afterwards."
I'm not even American. I've never even met any of the staff and yet they've been nothing but nice to me.
My experience with SG started with the staff photographer Talamia.
I've never really been around a lot of people who are nice to you just because it's who they are but my experience with her really set the tone for my experience with the site as a whole.
Right away, she treated me like an older sister.
Shooting sets really feels like hanging out with a friend. I remember the day we shot Enviable, I completely forgot I was there to shoot a set and almost went home without doing it.
My first experience with the higher ups came in the form of a FaceBook page called "Model for SuicideGirls".
Now I don't know who runs this page, but I think she deserves a medal.
You know what it reminded me of?
A preschool teacher.
Someone who has the patience to literally hold your hand every step of the way and explain things a million times until you understand.
By the time I actually joined the site, I was spoiled. I knew what to expect from the site and it didn't disappoint.
I realised for the first time that all the stories you hear about people who met their bestfriends/husbands/life-partners on the site, are true. In fact, it's almost expected. If you've been here long enough, you'll understand what I mean.
I have nothing but great experiences to share about the staff.
Everytime I've e-mailed them, no matter how silly the question, they have responded in the sweetest possible way.
Three seperate examples come to mind.
Firstly there was my new girl package which I didn't even know about.
I remember getting an e-mail from Sash saying it had just been returned to head office and I was like "whassat".
In a string of e-mails, I finally figured out how to properly write my address and the package was resent, given a tracking number and I think she even later asked if I had gotten it or not.
In a company of over 2 000 models, you don't think they'd have the time to sit there and make sure you got a bunch of free stuff that you weren't even entitled to and didn't even know you were going to get.
They probably don't have the time.
But they make it.
I have a friend who went pink last year but didn't have a PayPal account so didn't receive her cheque.
Eventually we became friends and she's now using my PayPal but in the meantime, SG has been e-mailing her reminding her that they owe her money and trying to help her figure out ways of getting it. Seriously?!?!
Don't lie to yourself by saying you would've bothered to chase someone down to give them money. But they did. And they have. And continue to do so.
In a company of over 2 000 models and considering they're making over 365 of these payments a year, you wouldn't think they'd have the time to remember that one model from over a year ago who they haven't paid yet.
And they probably don't have the time.
But they make it.
Best example would be my 21st.
I remember e-mailing them to ask for permission to use the logo on my fliers.
Instead, through months of e-mails exchanged between Rambo and Rigel, and a very helpful link to the SG Party Planners group, they pretty much planned the whole party for me.
When it came to the flier, I had quite a bit of trouble. The first flier I sent was really bad and Rambo was really sweet about it. Eventually after weeks of back and forth and fix this and change that I think they actually did it for me.
Now you tell me, in a company of over 2 000 models, who would think they had the time to sit and help some girl who lives across the world who they've never met plan a party that they weren't even going to attend?
Nobody would blame them if all they'd done was give me the go ahead to use the logo on my flyer.
But they went above and beyond that.
Did they have the time? Probably not.
But they made it.
And so, as for being "treated like complete shit by the staff", if this is what that feels like, let the abuse continue.
Moving along..
"NO one takes SG seriously. It is considered a joke."
Oh I love this one.
Being a SuicideGirl is really my main selling point as a model. So much so that when I go to events, I just introduce myself as Jeckyl Suicide.
Maybe I've just been living under a rock lately but the last time I checked, it's pretty much the most coveted title in the alternative modelling arena.
Granted South Africa is a really backward country and perhaps further ashore it's lost it's lustre.
But so far in my experience the only "joke" about being an SG is the look people get one their faces when I tell them. Priceless.
"Unless you are one of the few that sucks up to the staff and is featured regularly, no one will ever see a set from you, no matter how popular it is."
I am not popular on this site by any stretch of the imagination.
I'm not BFF's with the powers that govern, I don't have as many friends or get as much traffic to my profile as some of the more well-known girls. I hardly ever get featured on the fanpage, instagram, twitter or wherever else this site advertises these days.
And as for the "no matter how popular it is" bit, I don't even have that under my belt. My sets really aren't popular at all.
So, by this logic, I shouldn't even be pink. The fact that I have TWO set bought is unthinkable!
To break this one down... Yes there are popular girls. but that's not what gets you FP.
I've said this before in a previous blog when I was bitching about Hopefuls (bitching, which is now apparently something people get kicked off the site for LOL):
"It doesn't matter who you are, where you're from, what you look like or who you know.
If you make a good set, they will buy it. Period."
I went pink after 3 days in member review. My set had less than 500 comments. I'd barely been on the site for a month.
So no I wasn't popular, I hadn't had time to "suck up to the staff", had obviously never been featured and by no means had the most popular set in MR at the time.
I rest my case.
Look, I get it. Not everybody's experience with this site is the same.
Just because I'm having a great time, doesn't mean someone else will.
And just because you're having a bad time, doesn't mean someone else will.
At the end of the day, this is a personal choice.
So I won't shove SG sunshine and roses down your throat but don't shove hate down mine.
It is what it is. If you like it, stay. If you don't, leave.
Whatevs.
That's all I have to say.
Peace.
