tonite emotions have woken that have long lay dormant. tears flow freely that have too long been behind a high wall. my fingers pound at the keyboard vigorously, they can hardly keep up with my thoughts flooding from my mind. my life has come to a crossroads, i walk forward down a path i never thougth iw ould take, and in doing so, i am able to leave behind a part of me i never thought i would have to. luckily, i won't miss him, and i can't see him missing me much either, i've already vanished from his life as it is. quite honestly, it doesn't seem to have made any difference. he is not welcome in mine. severing ties is painful and difficult, but liberating and theraputic. i will not stay where i am not welcome or wanted. i will not allow myself to believe that what i feel or think is invalid or wrong, the tables will not be turned back on me, as i am leaving my burden on his shoulders to deal with until the day he passes.
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painful and liberating... it feels good to take back that control. good for you for your choices....
On reading your entry, big hugs for you, it can feel invigorating taking back your own life like that, being the one in the driver's seat. It's hard and it hurts, but you'll feel renewed at the end of it