jawyoga

i wish i wasn't so depressed and so shy. it makes it so hard to meet new people and go out and have fun and get out of this mood. i just worry that i am not good enough or pretty enough and that noboby will ever want to be with me. i feel like i am always the one who screws up and because of me things didn't work out in the relationship. what did i do wrong? what should i have done differently?

i was speaking to my ex in texas the other day. she told me that she was seeing this guy and that they are in an exclusive relationship and that he was in ohio for the summer.
it totally shocked me. we didn't break up becasue we were having problems in our relationship or because we didn't care for each other any more. we broke up because she missed her family in texas and she didn't want to do the long distance relationship thing. and next thing i know, she's dating a guy (a guy) who isn't even around for the next 4 months. yet after 3 years she could leave me high and dry and not want me anymore. good bye, don't follow, it's over because i don't want a long distance relationship and she decides that she is going to do a long distance relationship with a guy.

i'm sorry for the long rant. i'm just feeling like crap and it seems the weather here in CT is following my lead. i hope the rest of you out there are doin' better than me.