i'm back................
zona:
i cant believe your favorite movie is the point! in one of my last journal entries, i ended it with "me and my arrow." that's rad
well everyone that reads my journal. I've finally done it. my funds are almost to zero. I'm going to have say goodbye to sg land for awhile, at least until I find somw work or start selling my paintings. so love to you all and if for some outrageous reason anyone out there wants to contact me. my email is jarelshow@yahoo.com. peace. love. keep evolving...
Read More
Read More
gil:
stay black money
I haven't kissed a girl in a year and half, and it's starting to wear on me.
I want to fall........in.........
head first. hands open.
nothing to hide but nothing.
just to fall asleep by a girl would be nice.
picky though.
so I'll just have to wait............
patience.mmmmmmmmm......
I want to fall........in.........
head first. hands open.
nothing to hide but nothing.
just to fall asleep by a girl would be nice.
picky though.
so I'll just have to wait............
patience.mmmmmmmmm......
gil:
.
feeling good. love.andI'mouts.
mmmmmmm.... hardboiled eggs.......
"what happens when you die?"
"I would love to tell you but then I would have to kill you. ............and anyway why ask that qustion, when what happens when you don't, is so much more fun to explore."
working out. getting tough. combining body and mind to trancend both. paint more. need job. school's great. loving life. w/o death. heart is hard...
Read More
"what happens when you die?"
"I would love to tell you but then I would have to kill you. ............and anyway why ask that qustion, when what happens when you don't, is so much more fun to explore."
working out. getting tough. combining body and mind to trancend both. paint more. need job. school's great. loving life. w/o death. heart is hard...
Read More
martyr13:
heartfelt takes strong back my friend..
always..
i thank you for your kind words and insight..
it seems as though you always pick up dead on with what i mean man..
i'll check the book..
i have one to trade with you though..
its called days of war...and nights of love..
i think..
i'll find an author for you..
not sure..
i am sure..
that you will like it..
you just gotta bear with it for a sec..
and hang on..
and the girl..
well, she's great..and so am i..
it all comes out in the wash so they say..
just don't every try to paint someone with your own brush..
always..
i thank you for your kind words and insight..
it seems as though you always pick up dead on with what i mean man..
i'll check the book..
i have one to trade with you though..
its called days of war...and nights of love..
i think..
i'll find an author for you..
not sure..
i am sure..
that you will like it..
you just gotta bear with it for a sec..
and hang on..
and the girl..
well, she's great..and so am i..
it all comes out in the wash so they say..
just don't every try to paint someone with your own brush..
not working hard, to work hard at not working hard. but instead working hard to not work hard at working hard. make sense. .......good. love to ya'll.
martyr13:
some days my friend...
it seems as though i am designing perhaps the finest nervous breakdown ever....
in recorded history..
but then...
i tilt the bottle..just a little harder..
and it all works out for me..
hahah
i dig it..
it does suck that she isn't here...
i hate it..
and..
sometimes..
i worry..
and there are disagreements..
but hey..
its all in the life of a person who wants what they want..
so..
i accept it as the fodder for the engine to fuel my desire..
keep the love low..
but the fires high..
and always..
always..
wipe at least twice..
ahhahahahhaha
it seems as though i am designing perhaps the finest nervous breakdown ever....
in recorded history..
but then...
i tilt the bottle..just a little harder..
and it all works out for me..
hahah
i dig it..
it does suck that she isn't here...
i hate it..
and..
sometimes..
i worry..
and there are disagreements..
but hey..
its all in the life of a person who wants what they want..
so..
i accept it as the fodder for the engine to fuel my desire..
keep the love low..
but the fires high..
and always..
always..
wipe at least twice..
ahhahahahhaha
some days the world can be the greatest place on earth,
by gordon downie.
I'm off on the second,
I'll be unrecognizable after that,
I have you to thank for this time
and your sisters before you
and your mothers before them.
I live with architects
architects who designed
this perfect life.
but it's time for the grand unraveling
for the great confession to begin...
Read More
by gordon downie.
I'm off on the second,
I'll be unrecognizable after that,
I have you to thank for this time
and your sisters before you
and your mothers before them.
I live with architects
architects who designed
this perfect life.
but it's time for the grand unraveling
for the great confession to begin...
Read More
VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
littlegirllost:
Hiya. I will be in Denver until the 23rd, probably. Oh, you should come visit. You really should. I'm having a great time here, so far. Email me if you wanna come.
stopped digging. climbed out of hole. now what? goals that's it. I need some goals. paint. stop smoking. paint. go to gym. paint. write. do good in school. paint. find a job. and paint, paint, paint. good. that should keep me busy for a lifetime.
get ready........ and..................start.
love to ya'll.
get ready........ and..................start.
love to ya'll.
VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
gil:
rad
as fr as i know ive beed the only ut kid since may
so its cool im not alone any more big ups SG801
do you make it up to slc much?
oh & im adding you to my frined list
as fr as i know ive beed the only ut kid since may
so its cool im not alone any more big ups SG801
do you make it up to slc much?
oh & im adding you to my frined list
gil:
almost forgot
yeah
amateur
but yeah
yeah
amateur
but yeah
I tripped again. stumbling over myself. kicking me when I'm down. digging. and digging. so that later someone somewhere with crossed eyes, a chesire cat smile, and one hand behind their back, can throw down a rope ladder. and I'll have to put all my trust in this curious character, just so I can climb out of this silly hole I've put myself into.
so...
Read More
so...
Read More
VIEW 5 of 5 COMMENTS
rawr_ima_monster:
hey, thanks.
-I never know who's reading my journal unless they elave comments...scary
Dave
-I never know who's reading my journal unless they elave comments...scary
Dave
tryptamine_____:
ha ha! i only kick people in the nuts if they tickle me.
for the creepy ones, i reserve the wierdest possible thing i can say. when i was in portland at the sg anniversary party, this creepy guy started hitting on me, telling me i should go to some pizza place on sunday. i said, "i don't live in portland and i won't be here on sunday." he said, "no, you should come to this pizza place on sunday." he kept persisting, and i was drunk and backed into a corner, so i finally said, "i don't eat." he blinked. "you what??" i said again, "i don't eat." in the most serious tone i could muster. about 5 seconds later, he walked away.
anyway, i haven't heard the latest flaming lips.
i don't buy c.d.s much. too many other things to spend that money on, like traveling to strange cities that i've never been to. 
by the way, i love what you wrote for "i lost my virginity...." that made me laugh a lot.
for the creepy ones, i reserve the wierdest possible thing i can say. when i was in portland at the sg anniversary party, this creepy guy started hitting on me, telling me i should go to some pizza place on sunday. i said, "i don't live in portland and i won't be here on sunday." he said, "no, you should come to this pizza place on sunday." he kept persisting, and i was drunk and backed into a corner, so i finally said, "i don't eat." he blinked. "you what??" i said again, "i don't eat." in the most serious tone i could muster. about 5 seconds later, he walked away.
anyway, i haven't heard the latest flaming lips.
i don't buy c.d.s much. too many other things to spend that money on, like traveling to strange cities that i've never been to.
by the way, i love what you wrote for "i lost my virginity...." that made me laugh a lot.
bacock!
in the confusion of becoming so deep, he inturn became shallow. now most of the time shallow is used as a term of aput down. but this shallow is in fact a good thing. he became so shallow that nothing was hidden from the folks around him. in other words he became himself. which is in fact noself.
love to all, and all to love....
Read More
love to all, and all to love....
Read More
feeling slow. feeling dumb. going to go shower and paint. not in the shower, after the shower.
must sacrifice my head for my (he)art. love to all.
I am her slave, but she does loves me. and that's why it hurts. she's my mirrior, to "find out". she wakes me. fills with guilt, then releases pressure. dumb and slow. dumb and slow. want to cry...
Read More
must sacrifice my head for my (he)art. love to all.
I am her slave, but she does loves me. and that's why it hurts. she's my mirrior, to "find out". she wakes me. fills with guilt, then releases pressure. dumb and slow. dumb and slow. want to cry...
Read More
jarelshow:
I have the fear. last night. as soon as I had fallen into slumber, I was "awakend" by something trying to steal me, my spirit/body/mind. paralyzed. trying to fight it off. trying to wake, to get out of this outer body experience. I can "see" my darkend room but cannot escape this "ghost". I tried to scream help to my mother, but found that I could not even breath. I try my hardest to wake and finally do. to find my body drenched in sweat. and a fear of falling asleep again. this has happened before but never this intense. and it kept happening all night. falling to sleep to be woken up by this eerie presence. this happened three to four times. and each lasted about an hour to a hour and a half. it started filling my mind with falsehoods. a kind of false reality. I thought spiders were going to attack me as I slept. I thought everyone was against me, and trying to steal me. I'm afraid to go to sleep tonight. because if this goes on again. I might be too weak to fight, and it might just take me. everyone be safe and much love. do not feel sorry for me. for this is supposed to happen. I don't know why? but it has happened , it is happening, and it's going to happen. the omniscient knows my breaking point. will it test it again tonight? I'll find out soon enough.
oh and I thought of a question last night, a strange question that includes everyone and everything.
it's hard being the center of the cosmos,
wouldn't you agree?
love to all. and all to love. xoxo
oh and I thought of a question last night, a strange question that includes everyone and everything.
it's hard being the center of the cosmos,
wouldn't you agree?
love to all. and all to love. xoxo
jarelshow:
whoa guys slow down on the submits