i really think something is wrong with me. i mean ... something else.
it's not a "cycle" thing, so i must just be really upset about something.
i cried at work today. how pathetic. and it's like ... nothing really happened to make me that upset, but ... i could not stop running to the bathroom to cry!
they're such little things when i try to ennumerate them. but, as a whole, they feel overwhelming.
as with everytime ... it doesn't feel like it will ever end.
sorry about all of the sad posting ... i really should take this garbage over to the other journal.
it's not a "cycle" thing, so i must just be really upset about something.
i cried at work today. how pathetic. and it's like ... nothing really happened to make me that upset, but ... i could not stop running to the bathroom to cry!
they're such little things when i try to ennumerate them. but, as a whole, they feel overwhelming.
as with everytime ... it doesn't feel like it will ever end.
sorry about all of the sad posting ... i really should take this garbage over to the other journal.
i retreated into my own life, quiet and afraid of people. the "things to do" piled up because i was frozen, so unsure of myself that nothing got done.
i went critical eventually. highpowered job in a window office in a skyscraper, and i was closing my door and crying at my desk. sitting in the bathroom stall crying more than i was working. falling asleep--at my desk, on the toilet, at stoplights driving to and from work.
calling my employer's "employee assistance" outfit started me toward better things.
e-mail me or call if you want. now, or anytime you want, 24/7. seriously. i'm e-mailing my phone numbers.
xo
scott