I hate that I'm always venting negative, usually girl-related bullshit on here but the fact is that this is the most private ranting space I have so it's the only place I can really do it without getting in trouble or exposing stuff to the wrong people.
So now that you're all aware that I'm not just like this all the time every day, here comes more. Sorry.
It's been over 4 months now since breaking up with the tornado & in the last few weeks I've just been feeling *far* worse about it all instead of any better. Time doesn't heal all worlds, it just drags them out longer making then deeper as it goes.
I went on a date a couple of weeks ago & I've actually slept with another girl casually a couple of times very recently & all of it just makes me feel more hollow & shitty & upset & miss her more. I just can't make myself interested really in anyone else. What the fuck is up with that? I can't even escape thoughts of her when I'm at work because a couple of songs that I'll always deeply associate with her just got added to the limited playlist in the shop.
I don't know what to do. Not talking to her doesn't help & trying to act like I used to with her doesn't help either. It just sucks & it's pulling my head apart more each day.
Also I know it's insanely petty but I feel a bit irritated lately at how close some of my friends are to her now. I know it's stupid & I don't *really* begrudge it but it does bother me a little. With one in particular I actually feel he started liking me less after we broke up & he started hanging out with her. It's a bit shit.
So now that you're all aware that I'm not just like this all the time every day, here comes more. Sorry.
It's been over 4 months now since breaking up with the tornado & in the last few weeks I've just been feeling *far* worse about it all instead of any better. Time doesn't heal all worlds, it just drags them out longer making then deeper as it goes.
I went on a date a couple of weeks ago & I've actually slept with another girl casually a couple of times very recently & all of it just makes me feel more hollow & shitty & upset & miss her more. I just can't make myself interested really in anyone else. What the fuck is up with that? I can't even escape thoughts of her when I'm at work because a couple of songs that I'll always deeply associate with her just got added to the limited playlist in the shop.
I don't know what to do. Not talking to her doesn't help & trying to act like I used to with her doesn't help either. It just sucks & it's pulling my head apart more each day.
Also I know it's insanely petty but I feel a bit irritated lately at how close some of my friends are to her now. I know it's stupid & I don't *really* begrudge it but it does bother me a little. With one in particular I actually feel he started liking me less after we broke up & he started hanging out with her. It's a bit shit.
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I guess though, a break up really brings out everyones true colours. People get caught red handed lying and talking behind your back. As much as it sucks
WOAH, woah. WHO'S THE GIRL?????? OMG. It seems we both have news to report when we eventually have coffee/dinner/facetime/fuckingsomethingwhererIcansmellyou
Hey, and don't beat yourself up about this. I know you still are. It's hard. She was a great gal, and you're a great guy, but it wasn't right. Just get some amunition ready to convince yourself if wasn't right so that everytime she pops into your head you can remind yourself why the whole thing was a bad idea.
Out of sight, out of mind is another really important one. No talking to her, thinking about her, going near her hosue, or even talking about her to anyone. Let her slip into your distant long term memory, instead of the rehearsable intermediate-term memory, where you can easily recall her any time you want. Every time you think about her, distract yourself, and she'll eventually fade.
And when she does, you can call her, have coffee, catch up on lost time and be a new person. Stronger and more protective of your own needs.
Love you.