jakemarley

"Pretty Vacant" - Sex Pistols

Theres no point in asking you'll get no reply
Oh just remember I dont decide
I got no reason its all too much
Youll always find us out to lunch !

Oh were so pretty oh so pretty vacant
But now and we dont care

Dont ask us to attend cos were not all there
Oh dont pretend cos I dont care
I dont believe illusions cos too much is real
So stop your cheap comment
Cos we know what we feel

Were pretty pretty vacant
Were pretty pretty vay-cunt
And we dont care

---

I watched Vanilla Sky on the SciFi Channel tonight. Id never seen it before, and was very disappointed, not because of the film, which was riveting, but because of the fact that I had been thinking of writing something about cryonics for years and just never got around to it. Oh well, maybe Id just better stick to writing about escorts and strippers and the dilemma of women in this liberated world.

I do not now, nor have I ever believed that women are inferior to men quite the opposite. It is not simply my self-loathing and general misandry that makes me feel this way either. Men, it seems, must use power and violence in some shape or form for anyone to take notice of them, and one must make others take notice or else one will be trampled like a sick calf in a stampeding herd. Men are rewarded for using their physical or mental strength to manipulate and coerce others so that they can control a disproportionate share of resources. Men are respected for their athleticism or their ability to kill others in war. They are also respected for their intelligence, but only when this intelligence is materially useful, when it can build a better mousetrap, and this is always less respected than brute masculinity. This is what we call beauty in men.

Women, however, have the option of competing with men on an intellectual level, which, as I stated, is a lesser valued commodity, or they compete by using their corollary to brute force - sexual beauty. Men are not truly beautiful in any physical sense. They are only considered beautiful when their bodies reflect muscular strength and the potential to do violence, to destroy. This is not beauty to me. Womens beauty reflects their ability to procreate, or simply to create. So, in one sense, women are no different than men, and use their intelligence or physicality to garner more resources for themselves and their offspring. On the other hand, at least womens physicality is productive.

Also this past week, I download episode 21 of season 9 of Stargate SG-1, scratching my head all the while because there were only 20 episodes this past season. My scalp was given its going over for a valid reason, because, upon opening the file, I did not see the SG-1 team, but rather Paris Hiltons breasts. No objections here.

While watching the video, I was struck with the impression that Ms. Hilton wasnt enjoying herself at all. When watching porn, it is always so easy to imagine that the ladies are doing this for the same reason as the men, which is, of course, total bullshit. They do it for the money, and I am far past the point of being so nave as to think anything else. However, the porn actresses are actresses after all and at least allow some suspension of disbelief. Little Ms. Hilton, on the other hand, was not a porn star. Her boyfriend was not much of a lover, and he couldnt so much as make a positive affirmation to her numerous inquiries as to whether or not he loved her. He didnt even see fit to lie about it. So, what was she getting from this guy? Shes fabulously wealthy, so that couldnt be it. There was nothing going on emotionally so far as I could tell. He fucked like a gorilla, and rather looked like one too. OK, so all men look like gorillas, especially when we are fucking, but we dont all fuck like gorillas not at least until it comes to the end and were busy getting ourselves off. Anyway, what was it? He was rather well endowed, I will give him that, but I dont think that is why she was involved in the videos. I think it was just for sheer boredom.

Or was it simply to show the world her physical power. Cameras, home movies, VHS, Internet they have all coalesced into this nightmarish Jerry Springer freak show where we all prostitute ourselves for what? What do we gain by turning ourselves into trailer park trashs 15 minutes? Ms. Hilton looks bored as Hell in those videos. Whats more, there is a sadness in her eyes. She looks at her breasts in the mirror like she is considering her life, like her breasts are her life.

Soon after seeing this video, I saw her on E! Entertainment television. She and her sister have their own show where they are supposed to be traveling the country working various jobs and living like normal people. Perhaps it is just me projecting my thoughts of her sex tapes on her entire life, but she doesnt look terribly happy in that program either. I just dont think she is a terribly happy woman. I think she is as big a dupe as the rest of us in believing that by plastering her intimate life on a screen for all to see she will somehow find happiness. I dont think she will, at least not through her fame, though I wish her all the best in finding happiness by some more realistic means.

So, Suicide Girls has become this huge thing touted as a liberating feminist force in which women are allowed to realize and express their sexual power. Thousands of women bare themselves just to be considered to appear on the site. Im sorry to say, many of these women are women by virtue of their legal age alone. A girl will come to know her sexual power in some way, and perhaps that then makes her a woman. My question is should this awakening occur on the punk-rock, Internet version of the Jerry Springer Show? Personally, I think would prefer to see more expression on this site and less realization. However, please remember that I write in my journal to ask questions of myself as well as answer them, but not too much to state opinion, which is something I reserve for boards.

Em's Spain #11 is one of my favorite SG pics, but is a little out of sync with my usual favs. The reason I like that particular pic is because it expresses just what I am trying to describe. The photo, taken by itself, speaks to me of innocence and discovery of sexual beauty. I mean, it is just the way she is looking at her brassier, like she is thinking, What is this thing? And how did it ever get on my body? She looks like Eve about a second after biting the apple, not just realizing that she is naked, but that she is force of nature.

I really dont know. I think I will always be confused by power. I can intellectualize it just fine, but knowing it is an entirely different thing. Watching cats rip apart birds will always unsettle me a bit. I believe humans will move into a society that functions wholly on cooperation and consent, but I believe that will only happen when each and every human has become transhuman. I would rather hope that becoming transhuman will not involve castration!