Update.
No body, no crime. Don't ask, bad aruba joke.
Okay, so last night I got to hang out with mystery girl. I guess this isn't my week for romance, I should have read my horroscope I guess. But I've been very entertained none the less. I hope you will be too.
Mystery girl and I picked right back up where we left off. Dancing, carrying on, having a good time. Turns out we have some mutual friends too. She hangs out at one of my (how do I say this...he's a friend of mine, but more like a boss--in a weird goodfellas kind of way...) friend's condos on the weekends at the beach. Alright, clarification time.
My job= I own a third of a company, we sell used IT gear. We're brokers, we buy for pennies on the dollar wholesale, sell the gear for retail.
I have worked for one of my partners since 2000. I was his "personal assistant" and I also was a utility guy at his first company, doing whatever needed to be done. Personal assistant duties included--driving his car to his summer home in the Hamptons and flying home. Flying up and driving it home at the end of the summer. Various errands and odds and ends around his home, blah blah blah. Well, the guy who's friends with mystery girl is my business partner's business partner in another venture. I would also do PA duties for him. We're all close and I'm taken care off by these guys. I actually owe alot to them, it's a good arrangement in a Cosa Nostra kind of way.
Anyway--mystery girl knows this guy, he's a friend of mine. So she perks up even more. Well, long story short. She gives me her number, insists I call. I call at about 1:30 or so to see if she's after partying or anything like that. She rusehes me off of the phone, so i move on. I'm on my motorcycle so I don't hear her call back. I get a message on my cell that I checked at about 8 this morning. It goes like this,
"Jake, the reason I gave you my number was to invite you to (unrecognizable name's) birthday party. I'm standing in front of my very angry boyfriend who say that you called. I need you to call back, talk to him, and tell him that the reason I gave you my number was to invite you to this party. Call me back please, you need to talk to him, he's very mad at me."
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!! That's me hysterically laughing at even remotely thinking I'd make that call. Fuck her. I asked her if she had a boyfriend. Answer? No (as she grinds into my crotch).
I wish I could post a sound clip, that message was a fucking classic. Good thing I had a $97 bar tab for all of her shots and drinks last night. Oh, and her friends booze as well. Heh, I'm a sucker. But whatever, that's alright. I don't need troublesome people in my life. What a fucking deadbeat she is. If I did make the call I would have had to tell him how badly she wanted to fuck, but I said no because she was drunk and I usually want anal, but she's tiny and I'm worried it would require a shoe horn and an inordinate amount of KY to make a proper insertion and my neighbors have a baby that I didn't want to wake with her cries of ecstacy and agony. You know, usual stuff.
I've been cheated on, I've walked in on it. Girls like her have caused me so much pain. I'm the last person that would lie for her, a fucking stranger. Silly tramp.
A year ago, I'd be trying to hit it. Now, get the fuck away.
Growing up sucks.
No body, no crime. Don't ask, bad aruba joke.
Okay, so last night I got to hang out with mystery girl. I guess this isn't my week for romance, I should have read my horroscope I guess. But I've been very entertained none the less. I hope you will be too.
Mystery girl and I picked right back up where we left off. Dancing, carrying on, having a good time. Turns out we have some mutual friends too. She hangs out at one of my (how do I say this...he's a friend of mine, but more like a boss--in a weird goodfellas kind of way...) friend's condos on the weekends at the beach. Alright, clarification time.
My job= I own a third of a company, we sell used IT gear. We're brokers, we buy for pennies on the dollar wholesale, sell the gear for retail.
I have worked for one of my partners since 2000. I was his "personal assistant" and I also was a utility guy at his first company, doing whatever needed to be done. Personal assistant duties included--driving his car to his summer home in the Hamptons and flying home. Flying up and driving it home at the end of the summer. Various errands and odds and ends around his home, blah blah blah. Well, the guy who's friends with mystery girl is my business partner's business partner in another venture. I would also do PA duties for him. We're all close and I'm taken care off by these guys. I actually owe alot to them, it's a good arrangement in a Cosa Nostra kind of way.
Anyway--mystery girl knows this guy, he's a friend of mine. So she perks up even more. Well, long story short. She gives me her number, insists I call. I call at about 1:30 or so to see if she's after partying or anything like that. She rusehes me off of the phone, so i move on. I'm on my motorcycle so I don't hear her call back. I get a message on my cell that I checked at about 8 this morning. It goes like this,
"Jake, the reason I gave you my number was to invite you to (unrecognizable name's) birthday party. I'm standing in front of my very angry boyfriend who say that you called. I need you to call back, talk to him, and tell him that the reason I gave you my number was to invite you to this party. Call me back please, you need to talk to him, he's very mad at me."
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!! That's me hysterically laughing at even remotely thinking I'd make that call. Fuck her. I asked her if she had a boyfriend. Answer? No (as she grinds into my crotch).
I wish I could post a sound clip, that message was a fucking classic. Good thing I had a $97 bar tab for all of her shots and drinks last night. Oh, and her friends booze as well. Heh, I'm a sucker. But whatever, that's alright. I don't need troublesome people in my life. What a fucking deadbeat she is. If I did make the call I would have had to tell him how badly she wanted to fuck, but I said no because she was drunk and I usually want anal, but she's tiny and I'm worried it would require a shoe horn and an inordinate amount of KY to make a proper insertion and my neighbors have a baby that I didn't want to wake with her cries of ecstacy and agony. You know, usual stuff.
I've been cheated on, I've walked in on it. Girls like her have caused me so much pain. I'm the last person that would lie for her, a fucking stranger. Silly tramp.
A year ago, I'd be trying to hit it. Now, get the fuck away.
Growing up sucks.
riva:
Have you considered staying in at night for a while? Perhaps curling up with a good book and cup of herbal tea?
gadget:
why did you ever quit?