ivorygirl

wow. i totally need to update this more.
<p>i feel like i completely disappointed you. i have no clue what i was doing, and i was nervous as fuck because you are so damn awesome. then i got jealous, which confused me even more. it's in my nature to avoid uncomfortableness, but i was never uncomfortable. it all felt very comfortable, which, again, weirded me out. i need to learn to deal with new situations a little better--as in, instead of fidgeting and biting my lip and my nails, i should maybe let people know what the hell is going through my head, and my heart. i was thisclose to letting go, which i guess literally made me run in the other direction, which admittedly was also quite nice. i'm not sure what to think of myself at all right now.