I think it's safe to go back home. The whole "treehouse of horror" thing has been dealt with and their case has been shredded before ever reaching court. Technically, I don't have to pay for anything right now, but I feel bad for their little girl, having totally retarded parents like that. So I'll buy her a new little house.
It's just as well, because if I thought my life was crazy, my brother's life is totally wacko. His girlfriend's mother called over today when I was alone (again). We talked about nothing for a while, and I mentioned something about the wonderfulness of sapphic encounters, and a look of horror came over her face. Then this happened:
"Do you know what they do?"
"Er .. I have an idea..."
"No, really. Do you know what they .. do...?"
Oh no, I thought, I'm going to have to get into this whole thing about fisting and dildoes with a nice old lady. This is not how I wanted to spend my Thursday morning.
"It's not something I really ..."
"Tongues!"
Thank you Jesus!
"Ah, that. Yes. Terrible, isn't it?"
"That's not what tongues are for, you know. You're not supposed to stick them up there."
"So I hear."
"I would hate that."
"Yes, you probably would."
It's just as well, because if I thought my life was crazy, my brother's life is totally wacko. His girlfriend's mother called over today when I was alone (again). We talked about nothing for a while, and I mentioned something about the wonderfulness of sapphic encounters, and a look of horror came over her face. Then this happened:
"Do you know what they do?"
"Er .. I have an idea..."
"No, really. Do you know what they .. do...?"
Oh no, I thought, I'm going to have to get into this whole thing about fisting and dildoes with a nice old lady. This is not how I wanted to spend my Thursday morning.
"It's not something I really ..."
"Tongues!"
Thank you Jesus!
"Ah, that. Yes. Terrible, isn't it?"
"That's not what tongues are for, you know. You're not supposed to stick them up there."
"So I hear."
"I would hate that."
"Yes, you probably would."
VIEW 6 of 6 COMMENTS
annisa:
it makes errands a bit more enjoyable 
alzy:
I dunno what's going on. He needs to learn better communication. One moment it looks like he's really trying and the next he jumps down my throat and fights with me for no reason. I just want back the guy i'd smoke and make milkshakes with, the guy who would show off the new guitar riff he learned that day, the guy who wrote all those things in that card in my pix. He's still there somewhere. I just want him to be himself again. I miss that.