I felt the need to write, so thus here I am. Writing.
Its almost three weeks since my last chemo treatment. And I gotta say that after all this, after everything I went through, it still doesn't feel real. I still feel a bit like I'm faking it, like it was never really all that bad. I almost feel bad for what I feel like I've put other people though the last nine months or so. I mean hell my family moved out here to help take care of me. I still remember the day the doctor called me with the test results, the immediate numbness I felt. My initial reaction of: "Huh? No fucking way. Well shit, now what?"
I'm a cancer survivor now.
Fuck those very words just seem weird. Almost foreign to my mouth. But its the fucking truth. I did it. I got the shit, I then went and got the shit taken care of.
It just sucks, I hear stories daily about the people who weren't so lucky as I was. People with aggressive cancers that are now dead or dying. And I again feel like a pretender, like I didn't really go through anything.
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I'm rambling. Ugh its almost 5 in the morning and I'm not tired. My sleep has been messed up all week thanks to a wonderful cold I somehow picked up.
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I'm glad I finally have a date to go back to work. Even though I loathe the place, I enjoy the company of the people there. And the money. I like the money they give me too.
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Come November-ish I'll need some new room mates if I want to keep this awesome place. Anyone interested?
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Do you have a plan for the zombie apocalypse? I do. Oh yeah you bet, I'm ready. Those stinking brain eaters ain't gonna get me. Besides I know the one guy who will lead the human race to victory over the zombie hordes. I got it on good authority that we win. But I won't slack. When the waves of undead come for us, I'll be ready.
Will you?
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I picked up Age of Conan, okay technically someone else picked up my copy for me, and the game is a TON of fun. I could just possibly have a replacement for my WoW addiction. Nothing like MMO addiction transference. If you play or are interested in playing look me up - Jaydon on the Deathwhisper server.
I also have a few alts either on Deathwhisper or another server, message me if interested.
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I have strongly felt the need to write lately. Its one of my most powerful callings, one of my greatest passions is to write. I've always aspired to it. Either as a novelist, or boyhood fantasy fulfillment as a comic book writer.
So I've been writing. Scraps of paper when I can't get to my word processor, memos on my cellphone when I don't have any paper. And its all very scattered and incoherent at the moment.
The sunlight filtered down through the canopy and reflected off the hard outer carapace of the thing before them. A hulking abomination birthed in hell's nightmares and raised on the festering pools of hatred and murder left behind by an angry demon race. It was an eerily silent behemoth, making not a sound as it ripped and tore through flesh and bone, gorging itself on destruction. But it barred their way, and he was not a man to be barred, slowed, or hindered in any way by any thing. With firm resolve he set his gaze and drew steel, making to do one last dance with death, a private war between himself and obliteration. Hardly a sound was heard in the courtyard as the hideous monstrosity moved forward with uncanny grace, and the battle was joined. In this moment the very planet held its breath as a species' final savior made his move, and all civilization's fate would be decided.
Stuff like that is written hastily and tossed all over the place. I really should put it all together.
----------
The bug has left me for the time being I guess. Writing done for now. Time to go watch The Fifth Element (I blame Corban's set for this inspiration). Hope all is well with everyone.
-JC
Its almost three weeks since my last chemo treatment. And I gotta say that after all this, after everything I went through, it still doesn't feel real. I still feel a bit like I'm faking it, like it was never really all that bad. I almost feel bad for what I feel like I've put other people though the last nine months or so. I mean hell my family moved out here to help take care of me. I still remember the day the doctor called me with the test results, the immediate numbness I felt. My initial reaction of: "Huh? No fucking way. Well shit, now what?"
I'm a cancer survivor now.
Fuck those very words just seem weird. Almost foreign to my mouth. But its the fucking truth. I did it. I got the shit, I then went and got the shit taken care of.
It just sucks, I hear stories daily about the people who weren't so lucky as I was. People with aggressive cancers that are now dead or dying. And I again feel like a pretender, like I didn't really go through anything.
----------
I'm rambling. Ugh its almost 5 in the morning and I'm not tired. My sleep has been messed up all week thanks to a wonderful cold I somehow picked up.
----------
I'm glad I finally have a date to go back to work. Even though I loathe the place, I enjoy the company of the people there. And the money. I like the money they give me too.
----------
Come November-ish I'll need some new room mates if I want to keep this awesome place. Anyone interested?
----------
Do you have a plan for the zombie apocalypse? I do. Oh yeah you bet, I'm ready. Those stinking brain eaters ain't gonna get me. Besides I know the one guy who will lead the human race to victory over the zombie hordes. I got it on good authority that we win. But I won't slack. When the waves of undead come for us, I'll be ready.
Will you?
----------
I picked up Age of Conan, okay technically someone else picked up my copy for me, and the game is a TON of fun. I could just possibly have a replacement for my WoW addiction. Nothing like MMO addiction transference. If you play or are interested in playing look me up - Jaydon on the Deathwhisper server.
I also have a few alts either on Deathwhisper or another server, message me if interested.
----------
I have strongly felt the need to write lately. Its one of my most powerful callings, one of my greatest passions is to write. I've always aspired to it. Either as a novelist, or boyhood fantasy fulfillment as a comic book writer.
So I've been writing. Scraps of paper when I can't get to my word processor, memos on my cellphone when I don't have any paper. And its all very scattered and incoherent at the moment.
The sunlight filtered down through the canopy and reflected off the hard outer carapace of the thing before them. A hulking abomination birthed in hell's nightmares and raised on the festering pools of hatred and murder left behind by an angry demon race. It was an eerily silent behemoth, making not a sound as it ripped and tore through flesh and bone, gorging itself on destruction. But it barred their way, and he was not a man to be barred, slowed, or hindered in any way by any thing. With firm resolve he set his gaze and drew steel, making to do one last dance with death, a private war between himself and obliteration. Hardly a sound was heard in the courtyard as the hideous monstrosity moved forward with uncanny grace, and the battle was joined. In this moment the very planet held its breath as a species' final savior made his move, and all civilization's fate would be decided.
Stuff like that is written hastily and tossed all over the place. I really should put it all together.
----------
The bug has left me for the time being I guess. Writing done for now. Time to go watch The Fifth Element (I blame Corban's set for this inspiration). Hope all is well with everyone.
-JC