irelandvixen

well hello my darlings. I decided i should update. Hope you all had a good holiday. My holiday wasnt the greatest except for my daughter she was wonderful. But for the most part I spent christmas alone! Someone I care about deeply was suppose to be there but couldnt make it which bummed me out! Plus none of my family lives close they all live on the west coast, well all but my sister and she decided to not invite me and my daughter to christmas dinner with her husbands family that live 15 mins from me. But whatever. I really missed matt over the holidays which isnt unusual. Last year was the best christmas, the best i had had in 3 years. Matt surprised me and put up a small christmas tree which melted my heart., Then went out and bought me som christmas presents, he was so proud of the presents that he bought me. Well the big present he got me was these god awful shoes. They were like sneekers with red glitter on part of them (the glitter part i loved) and then the rest was white with red and orange what looked like splatter pain on it and with (best YET) clocks on the side. Yup I said clocks. and you would think someone whos gonna put clocks on someones shoes is gonna put it on the inside so you can cross your legs and see the time nope they were on the outside of the shoe where the person wearing them had no way to acutally use them. I guess they wanted you to raise your leg when someone asked the time and make them read it themselves. hahaha! well he was so proud to get me these shoes. His cousin tried to talk him out of them but he was convinced I was going to love them. So i couldnt break his heart so i pretended to LOVE THEM! They werent the worse things id ever seen and i loved the glitter. So I wore them. But it was just so sweet all he did for christmas for me to make sure i had a great christmas!! I just miss that sweet innocence he had. I will always miss him i suppose. He gave me the greatest gift anyone could give me, he gave me my daughter Irelynn Rose. She is my heart my soul and my everything. He would have loved her!! anyways..

My parents were here for 2 weeks which was wonderful! they helped me get my apt iorganized. It turned out great! I miss them too they went home i really missed them for christmas! While they were here we got our pics taken and her newborn pics taken. I love them they came out beautiful! I have a few that i will share with you all....
my angel

I love this one!!!

my little christmas elf she even has pointy ears like for real!!!

I love this pic, mommy and Irelynn

people keep telling me when a baby smiles in their sleep an angel is talking to them. I really hope her daddy is talking to her telling her how much he loved her.

I think this one is beautiful too.

this one cracks me up looks like shes doing the devil horns saying ROCK ON!!!


I truely feel blessed cause of this little girl! Im not sure I could have survived what happened if I hadnt had to be strong for her. There was way more stress in my pregnancy that was good for anyone. She was a fighter and she was meant to be here. She saved me. It hurt so much when Matt died but I knew I couldnt break down that I had a life depending on me so I went on. I could have lost her at anytime with the stress I was under but she was a fighter she stayed stong which made me strong. I thank god and matt everyday that I have her with me! I will always have a piecve of matt with me! She looks so much like him its kinda heartwarming. It makes me smile! He may have screwed up alot of things in his life made a few too many mistakes but he did one thing right He made her and he loved me. He will forever be in my heart and on her face every time i look at her. i have a beautiful pic that makes me cry everytime I see it, I wanted to incorporate matt into the photoshoot so I have the locket with his pic, Irelynn is asleep with the locket drapped over her and his pic as clear as day. I will share that beautiful pic with you next time since I dont have it on this laptop. THank you matt for giving me the most beautiful daughter. Ill leave you with this.....

Love Always- Ireland and Irelynn