irelandvixen

Well here I am unable to sleep with a CRAZY headache! Watching Empire Records again! I love that movie! It gives me hope that even when everything feels like its falling apart it will turn out ok in the end! DAMN THE MAN! hahaha! So that makes me happy! But I just feel like I am screwing everything in my life up! I know what my heart wants but I am afraid I live in a fantasy world! I long for romance and passion! When i have the passion I lack the romance! When I find the one I find some way to sabatage it! I can totally understand what Bell means by her blog! What if I already found the one but its just in a few other people! There are things I loved about a couple of my ex's and I wish i could put them together to make the perfect man! hahaaha! yeah right! LOL! I just thought my life would be different! I mean by the time i was 25 i was suppose to have this perfect life! The great job, be happily married. have a happy family and not stressed about where my next meal is coming from or if I am gonna get kicked out of my house!

I really shouldnt blog when i am tired and its 6 am and i have a headache! hahaha! OH WELL! I just can't pin point the moment in my life where i made the wrong chose that helped turn my life into a never ending hell! Sometimes I wish there was some kind of rewind button, a redo! I mean things aren't ALWAYS bad but things are so uncertain in my life! I don't know if everything I have worked so hard for is gonna all fall apart! I am scared of that! I don't like to think about it but i know I have to! In order to keep from falling apart and being strong and moving on! Trying to get my life back together!


My sg account is about to expire again and I dont know how long it will be before I can get it back! I hope not to long! But I just dont know! If its a while I love you all and thank you for being there for me! You all mean the world to me and have helped me get through some hard times! Which is why I need to get back as soon as a I can cause I am gonna need some serious support shortly! But worry not my lovelies it will work out I am sure!



I just have to hope that all will work out the way that its suppose to! my time in ohio is just about up I go home June 8th! I get to go to Havanah (however you spell that) so I am happy about that! I will be sad to leave cause the people here are the best! I am looking forward to my GIRLS DAY OUT with Katie on Friday I need that! I am going to miss all of the wonderful people I have met since I have been here! They have been supportive and wonderful! I have met new friends and grew closer to the ones I knew already! I have a family here in Ohio! Which warms my heart and makes me want to cry!



Ok I should go now! I am hoping to get another blog up before my membership expires! I have to do a GWAR update! BEST NIGHT OF MY LIFE! here is a preview cause I got some evil bloody pics coming soon

I LOVE YOU GUYS! more later! Love-ireland