I am very sorry for your loss. I need to tell you this, so please don't think I am preaching. When my father died I went on a 10 year drinking binge, and you know what happened...Nothing. That's right, Nothing. I was still depressed, my life went nowhere, my bank account was empty, and my youth was gone. So, please do not drink to deal with the pain of this loss.
My thoughts are with you.