http://nipa1980.blogspot.com/2011/12/cowards-way-out-or-just-too-strong-for.html
the tragic death of gary speed at the weekend has shocked the sporting world.. one of the premier leagues most respected players.. and based on the outpouring of grief from his fellow professionals.. a much respected person as well...
a lot of comments have been made about the choice to take his own life.. with many expressing their belief that this was a selfish...
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the tragic death of gary speed at the weekend has shocked the sporting world.. one of the premier leagues most respected players.. and based on the outpouring of grief from his fellow professionals.. a much respected person as well...
a lot of comments have been made about the choice to take his own life.. with many expressing their belief that this was a selfish...
Read More
baax:
Thanks for the Buddha boost. 
its easy to be a good person when everything is going your way.. the real test is being the best you can be when life gets a little tough...
pp420:
so true.
such happiness.. even a glimpse.. can be so painful when it ends...
but its that pain that makes you realise just how truly happy those moments were...
http://nipa1980.blogspot.com/
but its that pain that makes you realise just how truly happy those moments were...
http://nipa1980.blogspot.com/
mellon:
You might want to consider reading up on Stoicism. I've found it very helpful. I think that you are on the wrong track when you say that we can only truly appreciate joy when we experience its loss. I think joy is just great when it's happening. It doesn't matter that we know we are happy: what matters is that we _are_ happy.
I hope you get some more happiness in your life soon.
I hope you get some more happiness in your life soon.
maddame:
hey dude
mad!
we're going to be jam packed when we in town. but alas, may be back for Miss Alternaitve Aus soon enough!
mad!
we're going to be jam packed when we in town. but alas, may be back for Miss Alternaitve Aus soon enough!
after a culture packed.. food infused.. wine soaked and adrenaline pumping weekend with some awesome people.. i'm shattered and going to bed...
i've uploaded the video of the skydive and this can be found at the bottom of the 'my kind of fun' page on my blog - http://nipa1980.blogspot.com/p/my-kind-of-fun.html...
more photo's and news of an incredible weekend to follow very shortly.. meanwhile the donations...
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i've uploaded the video of the skydive and this can be found at the bottom of the 'my kind of fun' page on my blog - http://nipa1980.blogspot.com/p/my-kind-of-fun.html...
more photo's and news of an incredible weekend to follow very shortly.. meanwhile the donations...
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i didn't go to japanese class this evening.. instead i ended up at the park with a friend.. talking about adri.. he was one of my best friends in school.. and he was killed in a car accident when i was 18...
it made me realise just how long its been since i've spoken to someone about him.. though i still think about him lots.....
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it made me realise just how long its been since i've spoken to someone about him.. though i still think about him lots.....
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gelth:
Thankyou so much. The sleeve looks awesome, by the way. I'm very sorry to hear you've been through a similar feeling. I honestly wouldn't wish this on anyone but it's fantastic to know that I have support, even if it is through the interwebs
carnagefairy:
Done!
inkedbuddhist:
awesome.. thank you!
am posting on here only because of the anonymity i have on here as opposed to my blog or facebook.. and i really don't want to be sharing this in public right now...
i'm sinking.. my divorce was finalised this week and it has fucked me up big time.. i'm lower than i have been for a while and am on the verge of tears...
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i'm sinking.. my divorce was finalised this week and it has fucked me up big time.. i'm lower than i have been for a while and am on the verge of tears...
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mellon:
Dude, that sucks. If I were there I'd hang around and commiserate with you, but I'm not. Don't you have a sangha yet? If not, you need to find one. I don't know where you are in Oz, but if you tell me, I may be able to hook you up with people who are in the know, and I'm happy to try. I have friends in Melbourne, and in Brisbane, and possibly some connections in Sydney as well.
One of the unfortunate things about meditation is that we can do it on negative objectsthings that only hurt us when we meditate on them. This is what you are doing to yourself right now. You need to use the tools of your practice to help you. They say the easiest way to break depression is to find someone to help, and help them. Your STFU project is a good idea, but it may be too impersonal for what you need right now. I don't know if there's a ready supply of homeless people where you live, but sometimes the best thing you can do is to just find someone who's at the end of their rope but hasn't lost hope yet, and do them some kindness that makes them smile. You could call it selfish, but it won't feel that way to them, nor will it feel that way to you.
For your nightmares, go to bed thinking about compassion and gratitude. As you're going to sleep, use your mindfulness practice to keep your mind either on kindnesses people other than your ex have done for you (because you can't dwell on your ex right now) or on opportunities you will have in the future to do kindnesses to others. Or if you have a close teacher whom you miss, put your mind on him or her as you go to sleep. It sounds hokey, but it might work. And when you wake up, before you open your eyes, set an intention to do something to help someone today. Do this even if you wake up with a nightmare.
As for the meditation thing, use your reason to break bad logic. There's no Buddhist concept of guilt. Negative karma you have committed comes back to you, so you don't have to worry that the books are unbalanced. All you need to worry about is what you put on the books going forward. And there is no The One. You are young, and you will meet someone new again someday, and you will do a better job with her because you've learned from the past. You don't have to despair. When I broke up with my sweetie of five years back in 1997, I thought I'd totally screwed her, but she's fine now, and I'm fine too, and some amazing things came into both my life and hers as a result of our breakup.
Anyway, I'm sorry you're going through this, and I hope this was helpful and not just long-winded nonsense.
One of the unfortunate things about meditation is that we can do it on negative objectsthings that only hurt us when we meditate on them. This is what you are doing to yourself right now. You need to use the tools of your practice to help you. They say the easiest way to break depression is to find someone to help, and help them. Your STFU project is a good idea, but it may be too impersonal for what you need right now. I don't know if there's a ready supply of homeless people where you live, but sometimes the best thing you can do is to just find someone who's at the end of their rope but hasn't lost hope yet, and do them some kindness that makes them smile. You could call it selfish, but it won't feel that way to them, nor will it feel that way to you.
For your nightmares, go to bed thinking about compassion and gratitude. As you're going to sleep, use your mindfulness practice to keep your mind either on kindnesses people other than your ex have done for you (because you can't dwell on your ex right now) or on opportunities you will have in the future to do kindnesses to others. Or if you have a close teacher whom you miss, put your mind on him or her as you go to sleep. It sounds hokey, but it might work. And when you wake up, before you open your eyes, set an intention to do something to help someone today. Do this even if you wake up with a nightmare.
As for the meditation thing, use your reason to break bad logic. There's no Buddhist concept of guilt. Negative karma you have committed comes back to you, so you don't have to worry that the books are unbalanced. All you need to worry about is what you put on the books going forward. And there is no The One. You are young, and you will meet someone new again someday, and you will do a better job with her because you've learned from the past. You don't have to despair. When I broke up with my sweetie of five years back in 1997, I thought I'd totally screwed her, but she's fine now, and I'm fine too, and some amazing things came into both my life and hers as a result of our breakup.
Anyway, I'm sorry you're going through this, and I hope this was helpful and not just long-winded nonsense.
inkedbuddhist:
Wow dude.. thats awesome.. you speak so much truth...
Have surrounded myself with friends the last few days.. good people make it so much easier...
Thanks again Mellon
Have surrounded myself with friends the last few days.. good people make it so much easier...
Thanks again Mellon