Away We Go!!!
Pop a quarter in the slot and watch the machine start to rock. That's right ladies and gents, the rant machine is winding up for the pitch!!!
Post work yesterday, I made a stop at the local Wally World to pick up makings for one of my dishes I created- Artichoke/Caper/Mushaboom Alfredo and fettuchini... And bread sticks that I slathered in butter, garlic powder, and salt. They tasted almost identical to Olive Garden bread sticks- Holy yumm-o Batman. Once I entered the doors at Wally World, it soon became apparent that this adventure was ill fated from the get go.
I guess when it is Christmas break for the kiddies, that means it's time for the mom's to take them to the store to let them run wild, getting free babysitting from the other store patrons and frazzled store staff! Tired looking moms with their grocery carts flanked by mini-herds of their children clogged major aisles and probably contributed to the amazing amount of display damage and general run down appearance of the entire store. I waded through slowed traffic, waiting to grab two tubes of bread sticks, and again had to damn near take a number to get a package of fresh mushabooms!
I then went to the International Foods/Pasta aisle to get the base sauce and pasta for the dinner dish. As I bickered with myself which Alfredo sauce would be better, completely lost in thought- that's when a screaming pain coursed up my legs from my ankles, followed by laughter and cackling in tiny little voices. I spun around, face contorted in immense pain and loudly scolded "WTF?!?!?" The offending ankle biters held their breath and stopped laughing. Their mother, at the other end of the aisle, rushed to their aid, saving them from the ranting lunatic (me).
"You can't say that! Their children!"
"I'm sorry, Mother of the Year, maybe you should pay a little fucking attention to them?"
"It's hard to keep track of them while I'm shopping,-"
"No shit! But congrats on having six beautiful little tax refund guarantees! You mind keeping your legs closed from now on, or are you Catholic?"
"I think I'm offended by what you are insinuating!"
"I'm offended at the fact you kids just ran me the hell over with your cart! Before they start to pick off little old ladies in amigos- perhaps you should go lock them in the car with the windows cracked."
"You obviously don't have children, do you?"
"Aww, shucks, what gave it away? The lack of diapers and midget clothing in my cart?"
I turned and left the woman huffing in the aisle. Fuming to myself, I was the one damn near picking off little old bittys in amigos on my way to the register. If you want to have a whole flock of children- great! Good for you! But that doesn't mean you can let them run a muck in Wally World! Some women like using their uterus' to re-vamp the populations- I am not one of those women. If you do not have the tolerance or gumption to pay attention to more then one kid- I suggest you stop at one kid- not six! Get a nanny, dump them on your mother for the day, something! But do not let your kids tear apart a store because you can't find it within yourself to pay attention to them!
I hope I'm not the only one here thinking the same thing, but if I am. Sorry to offend anyone. This again, is my opinion. I suggest everyone take care to not go to a big block store till the kiddies return to school. For the sake of your ankles.
Pop a quarter in the slot and watch the machine start to rock. That's right ladies and gents, the rant machine is winding up for the pitch!!!
Post work yesterday, I made a stop at the local Wally World to pick up makings for one of my dishes I created- Artichoke/Caper/Mushaboom Alfredo and fettuchini... And bread sticks that I slathered in butter, garlic powder, and salt. They tasted almost identical to Olive Garden bread sticks- Holy yumm-o Batman. Once I entered the doors at Wally World, it soon became apparent that this adventure was ill fated from the get go.
I guess when it is Christmas break for the kiddies, that means it's time for the mom's to take them to the store to let them run wild, getting free babysitting from the other store patrons and frazzled store staff! Tired looking moms with their grocery carts flanked by mini-herds of their children clogged major aisles and probably contributed to the amazing amount of display damage and general run down appearance of the entire store. I waded through slowed traffic, waiting to grab two tubes of bread sticks, and again had to damn near take a number to get a package of fresh mushabooms!
I then went to the International Foods/Pasta aisle to get the base sauce and pasta for the dinner dish. As I bickered with myself which Alfredo sauce would be better, completely lost in thought- that's when a screaming pain coursed up my legs from my ankles, followed by laughter and cackling in tiny little voices. I spun around, face contorted in immense pain and loudly scolded "WTF?!?!?" The offending ankle biters held their breath and stopped laughing. Their mother, at the other end of the aisle, rushed to their aid, saving them from the ranting lunatic (me).
"You can't say that! Their children!"
"I'm sorry, Mother of the Year, maybe you should pay a little fucking attention to them?"
"It's hard to keep track of them while I'm shopping,-"
"No shit! But congrats on having six beautiful little tax refund guarantees! You mind keeping your legs closed from now on, or are you Catholic?"
"I think I'm offended by what you are insinuating!"
"I'm offended at the fact you kids just ran me the hell over with your cart! Before they start to pick off little old ladies in amigos- perhaps you should go lock them in the car with the windows cracked."
"You obviously don't have children, do you?"
"Aww, shucks, what gave it away? The lack of diapers and midget clothing in my cart?"
I turned and left the woman huffing in the aisle. Fuming to myself, I was the one damn near picking off little old bittys in amigos on my way to the register. If you want to have a whole flock of children- great! Good for you! But that doesn't mean you can let them run a muck in Wally World! Some women like using their uterus' to re-vamp the populations- I am not one of those women. If you do not have the tolerance or gumption to pay attention to more then one kid- I suggest you stop at one kid- not six! Get a nanny, dump them on your mother for the day, something! But do not let your kids tear apart a store because you can't find it within yourself to pay attention to them!
I hope I'm not the only one here thinking the same thing, but if I am. Sorry to offend anyone. This again, is my opinion. I suggest everyone take care to not go to a big block store till the kiddies return to school. For the sake of your ankles.