The Feministe comments were about a piece of extremely inappropriate, callous and cruel satire. These comments are about actual violations.
The more men are raped, the more men will be walking around having some small idea of what women go through every day. Whether or not they ever connect this revelation to the common sense ideas of radical feminism is pretty dicey, though.
I can only hope that being raped gives even the most insensitive man some small distaste for raping himself. Once raped, the fantasy is over. Once raped, a man can for the first time know that sex can happen without human dignity, and that losing that dignity is the opposite of arousal.
But a man never deserves pity for being raped. After all, it's not like he had sex. Unless he's a gay man, it was just a little lesson in what it's like to be treated like an object.
Men can be raped? Oh, you mean sodomized! Which is not quite the same thing as rape. Ask any woman that's been raped and sodomized. Or are we going to combine the two at women's expense just to be inclusive of men? So that men can claim they're victims instead of the victimizer?
Don't forget how often women rape men and we don't even hear about it.
That's because it happens so rarely, it's not even worth mentioning.
Vagina = anus. Absolutely loony.
Rape happens to women, sexual assault happens to men. If I had my way, the word rape wouldn't even apply to men because being penetrated by a penis in a non-sexual area of your body isn't the same thing.
I can understand gay men suffering from rape, but straight men can so easily disassociate themselves and their feelings from a sexual assault that the effect is much different. To pity a straight man for being raped is to assume that being feminized in a patriarchy is something to be pitied; as it also happens to be a normal state for the entire sex class, that's simply spreading around a little too much pity for my pity glands to produce.
A straight man who tries to understand the ideas of radical feminism can feel feminized by the patriarchy in other, more subtle ways, and it all blends together into a human disgust for the whole patriarchal kit and kaboodle.
If the most viciously patriarchal men become so pornsick and perverse that they start to turn on their own kind to satisfy their inextinguishable lusts then that just means they will be leaving a few more women alone. Men raping men will never arouse my pity. But rapists will always get my bitterest hate and scorn.
I still think even men who rape men should be fixed by removing their genitals. I think a rapist has something terribly wrong with his mind and body that can be fixed by the removal of the testosterone-producing glands and associated apparatus.
Oh, gimme a break. Since when are men quiet? Men piss, moan, whine and cry more than any woman I've ever seen. I'm really tired of men being portrayed as big, strong, he-men, that keep it all inside. What a bogus bunch of crap.
Men just don't run it by the brothers is all. Because the worse thing a man can admit is that he was treated like a woman. That opens up the possibility that other men might laugh at him. Which, to men, is worse than death. He doesn't seek "help" because he knows that "help" is another bunch of bogus crap. Women, however, are really, really impressed by it. So he manipulates women with it. She doesn't get how insulting he views it that he was treated like her. A lowly, contemptuous, woman.
P.S. The odds are almost nil that a man will be sodomized. With regards to males, it is young males who are most likely to be subjected to it. IOWs, boys. That's the power, privilege and fun of being a man. He doesn't have to worry about such things. Because it happens so rarely, that it's not even worth discussing.
I do want to emphasize that there were dissenters to these views, most notably bitter-girl.
The quote that brought this up? One from Ms. Parrish of the Rape, Abuse & Incest Network stating (according to a poster who wrote to her for clarification) that men are less likely than women to seek help after a rape or sexual assault than are women.
I've been there. Other men I've known have been there. And it's been true for all of us.
Not because of any fear of being seen as weak, or gay, or feminized, but precisely because of attitudes like these. That it isn't that bad. That we got lucky or had beer goggles on. That a guy can't get an erection unless he actually wants to have sex. (The female doctor I saw about this actually said that to me after I told her about my assault: that there had to have been some part of me that wanted to do it, otherwise I wouldn't have been able to.)
I've had to end intimate encounters because of flashbacks. I've had relationships break apart over having them in other circumstances and going into spasms and convulsions. And I've become essentially celibate for the last three years because of this. I don't even flirt now, much less try and date anyone.
We -- guys who have been raped (excuse me, non-sexually touched or penetrated in unfortunate but educational ways) -- have no reason to believe that the offender would get convicted. All that would result would be humiliation, support for the woman that victimized us, and an acquittal. We talk with each other, and maybe a therapist. But that's about it.
Pursuing charges? Bringing this up as a public issue?
There's no point.
But I do read Feministe almost daily. It's nice to see they took the high road. And thanks for posting the story about the CCSU guy. That's another mentally ill misfit that needs a good editor.