I apologize for my absence as of late- life works in odd ways and I just wasn't as dedicated to things I am passionate about as I would like to be. I had given up bits of myself for someone else's comfort thinking I would find some kind of solitude but all I found was unfulfillment. And then my oldest and best friend passed away in a car accident on the 1st. My year started out tragically, a loss no one ever deserves to feel. At first I was devastated, then I was angry, fuck, I still am, how can I not be? She left too soon , she has two kids at home that still just don't get that she's not coming through the garage door ever again. But then I started listening to the universe, the ripples of life and existence, and maybe even to my dear friend, Ashley. It's so cliche to even say, but, I've never felt anything more true in my core. Life is unpredictable, life is short, and most of all, life is not promised, not the rest of today nor tomorrow's sunrise. You truly have to live each day passionately and fully, do whatever you wanna do and fuck everyone else! If I died tomorrow, I would be very disappointed in the person I've been in the past couple of years, I would be so mad that I didn't live up to my potential... I want to create more art, be active for myself, and really push myself out of my comfort zone. Living comfortably isn't living fully and I'm tired of just existing. With losing Ashley, I gained a bit of myself that I haven't seen in years. She relit the flame that I blew out on myself way too early. I am not only thankful for the memories she gave me in life, but for this beautiful lesson she taught me in death. So cheers to Ashley, and cheers to the start of a beautiful transformation! XO
PS. Thank you guys for all the love on my new sets.... the positivity you've all been sending my way has really helped lift my spirits since I got the news of her passing and reaffirmed my decision to dedicate myself to my modeling more! You all ROCK! I'm thankful to be apart of such a beautiful community :hearts:
