i tattooed my brother today... goldfish and skulls and water covering his whole lower leg. it's gonna be dope. it's also going to take fucking forever. it'll be a long time before i have any pics of that.... i'm sure you're all just dying to see pictures of tattoos, so i guess i'll have to feed your dirty habit with other shit i've done lately.
ok, so this homey got married to linda and it turned out that linda started to suck after 10 years. who knew? so he had me make this lion to so she'd go away. apparently lions can do that.
this girl was like 9 years old and had this baby named zach or some shit, i dunno. i just do what they tell me.
dudeguy here was all "yo this shit sucks, fix it." he just threw me a pile of money and refused to even look at the drawing i did on him before i tattooed it. he didn't look at it at all until it was done. i should have done a big pink weiner instead. fuck, i just realized i missed a great opportunity.
in other news, i'm buying a car and moving to mexico next week, with a drug dealer named laser. or actually, i'm moving next month, to southeast portland. but i'm going to live with drug dealers. or actually, it's just with my friend ben. who does lots of drugs. actually, he doesn't do any drugs at all. and i'm not buying a car, it's a shopping cart. nevermind, actually i'm not buying anything because i already stole the shopping cart. wait, no i didn't. nevermind. i'm just moving.
back to the part about linda.... it turns out that my mom (also named linda)has been having an affair with some dude for almost a year. and that now she's living by herself. not with my dad, who has a moustache, and all of the common sense in their marriage. i tell you, that shit is WEIRD to think about. apparently lindas are a difficult breed to train. maybe "linda" is to women as "lemon" is to cars. i think i'm going to start talking like that. "dude you don't want her, she's a total linda. shitty mileage."
i got a few of my tattoos published in the most recent international tattoo art. i know it's not a big deal, but this is the first time as far as i know, so it's at least a little deal. figures it still says i work in new hampshire... i sent that shit in like a year ago. those fuckers.
i saw talladega nights. for those who haven't seen it, there's seriously something to out-loud laugh at every 20 seconds, for 2 hours. it's kind of amazing. not that it's a good movie, but man. for the rest of the night after you see that movie, the dumbest shit ever will still make you laugh.
i'm at work. lame tattoos ahoy!
ok, so this homey got married to linda and it turned out that linda started to suck after 10 years. who knew? so he had me make this lion to so she'd go away. apparently lions can do that.
this girl was like 9 years old and had this baby named zach or some shit, i dunno. i just do what they tell me.
dudeguy here was all "yo this shit sucks, fix it." he just threw me a pile of money and refused to even look at the drawing i did on him before i tattooed it. he didn't look at it at all until it was done. i should have done a big pink weiner instead. fuck, i just realized i missed a great opportunity.
in other news, i'm buying a car and moving to mexico next week, with a drug dealer named laser. or actually, i'm moving next month, to southeast portland. but i'm going to live with drug dealers. or actually, it's just with my friend ben. who does lots of drugs. actually, he doesn't do any drugs at all. and i'm not buying a car, it's a shopping cart. nevermind, actually i'm not buying anything because i already stole the shopping cart. wait, no i didn't. nevermind. i'm just moving.
back to the part about linda.... it turns out that my mom (also named linda)has been having an affair with some dude for almost a year. and that now she's living by herself. not with my dad, who has a moustache, and all of the common sense in their marriage. i tell you, that shit is WEIRD to think about. apparently lindas are a difficult breed to train. maybe "linda" is to women as "lemon" is to cars. i think i'm going to start talking like that. "dude you don't want her, she's a total linda. shitty mileage."
i got a few of my tattoos published in the most recent international tattoo art. i know it's not a big deal, but this is the first time as far as i know, so it's at least a little deal. figures it still says i work in new hampshire... i sent that shit in like a year ago. those fuckers.
i saw talladega nights. for those who haven't seen it, there's seriously something to out-loud laugh at every 20 seconds, for 2 hours. it's kind of amazing. not that it's a good movie, but man. for the rest of the night after you see that movie, the dumbest shit ever will still make you laugh.
i'm at work. lame tattoos ahoy!
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yay. tattoos~!