It's always the same: wake up and wonder why you should bother getting out of bed. Why do I? There's nothing for me out there waiting to be found that will make me happy. Happiness is for people who aren't hideous abominations whose parents were too soft to kill them in their sleep and put them out of their misery before they reached a point where they can look deeply enough into their worthless existence.
But surely beauty isn't the be all end all. Wrong. Contrary to trite rubbish like "beauty is the eye of the beholder" (by the way this is just something to tell people who are hideous. The actual phrase should be "beauty is whatever the media says it is"). Take a look in the newspapers and especially at articles where a substantial amount of people have been killed. It's always the attractive people who are front and centre of these articles and are used to galvanise people into action or into a response or into giving money to some cause. Ugly doesn't sell.
You know what else ugly almost never gets you? A job. Sure if you are highly skilled enough you can get the job anyway but primarily it will be your looks first and then your connections to other people in that company. Yes I have a very low paying job (keeping in mind I work in Australia) that i've worked for the same company for 9 and a half years (considering most people of my generation flit their pretty selves around from company to company looking for a bigger pay check) and i make just over 50k a year. pretty dismal for someone who is almost 30.
It actually leads into my other point regarding work. People will rarely reward you if you are an exceptionally hard worker. In fact they will make it a point to reward those who are lazy and burden you with more work. I started at the bottom as someone who does deliveries and to date the only person to have to do photocopying whilst being in deliveries and not the easy stuff either but copying books and even magazines which is time consuming and requires a bit of precision. After a little over a year I moved into court copying starting with just one court and then having to do all of them because I could do them all much faster then the previous guy; even without proper training. After another year and a half I was again shafted sideways into onsite copying. I should mention I am still expected to know everything about all these sections and also that since then nobody else has had to do these jobs as swiftly or efficiently. What's more galling is the fact that everyone who has been promoted to the position of supervisor has only managed to hold onto their job thanks to my knowledge and help. But i'm an ugly white male so who gives a fuck.
Contrary to what people believe my intellect doesn't skew towards anything that matters. I'm not academically smart so it's not like I can become a scientist or an engineer or something that requires intelligence. I could do law or IT but I greatly despise both those industries since the people in them are primarily lazy and yet get paid shit loads of money for their minimal efforts. It is just button pushing and Law is just talking in front of some people while your minions get all the information for you. Simple over paid jobs.
Simply put I get up and I work and I get money and I pay bills. Bills which increase because Sydney is in a massive housing bubble and our rent is set to go up an extra $30 a week. Manageable but considering it only increased $10 last time this seems a bit over the top.
Not like I have anything else to get up for. I take no joy from anything any more or if I do its very temporary. Games I play just come down to a crapfest of luck and being the unluckiest person in human existence its mostly just a time waster. And who wants to be friends with someone ugly? no one really because it diminishes them in other peoples eyes as well and everyone wants lots of friends so the ugly ones will be by themselves unless it's to serve some purpose.
People like to make out that everyone has a purpose on this earth. Well unless my torment amuses someone I have no purpose. I'm just a worthless human being with no assets worthwhile to our pathetic species and the only reason I stick around is in the vein hope that I get to be around when Humans become extinct because in truth humans are nothing but parasites; some become fatter on the suffering of others in order to live an easy life.
