impboy

a few days ago, my friend lyn went grey.

there's a teeny-tiny comment she made in my last entry. it's short and sweet, and i'd rather not see it, now that she's gone.

you see, i miss her more than i thought i would. she was sweet and open-minded and actually liked to seem to like my obnoxious little posts on her journal. boy, a little appreciation on this site towards most people on this site goes a long, long way, let me tell you.

you know how i met her? one time, i was, for reasons i don't remember, on fractal's page. she asked fractal how she got her hair that shade of purple. i didn't know fractal at the time, but knew enough to know that she got deluged with requests for attention all the time, and figured that i had a pretty good idea, so i posted my guess on her journal. much to my surprise at the time, fractal actually answered her question, but lyn and i became friends anyway through that initial exchange.

she did pretty well, here, i thought, made friends, and got on the cover of steveneurotic's "Pop-Punk" compilation with a few other SGs. but now she's gone, and i think she left because she felt a little neglected. i mean, all she wanted was friends, and i don't think i was a particularly good one.

and here's my point: you know, it's a really fucked up thing that our society does when we teach young women that the only thing that will get them attention and kindness is their bodies. i mean, more SGs than i care to admit seem to hinge a lot of their self-esteem on the pages of comments that follow their sets and how many people put them up as their "favorite girls." and it leaves everyone else vying for their attention, and a lot of other people who can't compete in the cold.

i've read a lot of feminist criticism - and praise - for this site, and it always makes me laugh, because it's always written by people who aren't part of the community and therefore can't really know what's good or bad about it. right now, i just can't help but meditate on the bad-but-true fact that as "punk rock" and "alternative" as this site, we - and that means me too - are only teaching young women the same thing britney spears and christina aguilera teaches them: that their bodies are the only things that will get them love, attention and a big-ass friends list. what's so fucking punk about that?


if any of you see lyn, tell her i miss her very, very much.




so i've found a video i once starred with online for a song my friend ben chatrer wrote with DEAN WEEN called "crispy crackly dave." it was shot in my old apartment in NYC's chinatown many, many years ago. ben is this record store clerk, musician and unrepentant anglophile that hails from a parallel universe directed and casted by wes anderson. looking at this video, it's scary to see how young i was once.

and really, i'm not this scary looking in person.

BOO!