Can I get my Grown man on for a second?
In my last journal I had a lot of questions about break ups and whatnot. About ten minutes after I hit save entry my grandmother called. She called to tell me that my oldest brother (the one in my pics.) is getting a divorce. No one knows why. According to her, hes just tired of being married. It looks like hes just having a Im thirty plus and Im scared crisis. It also seems that the divorce in one sided. His wife doesnt appear to show any signs of wanting to end it. And I love my sister-in-law. I dont want to lose another big sister. ( Damn I miss you Z. Sometimes I wonder if all this would be happening if you were still here.) His son is starting to act up in school which is something he never did before. So I suppose he knows something is going on.
This isnt completely out of character for him because he is a bit selfish (all my siblings are, including me.) but this seems a little drastic. My relationship with my brother has always been Older brother/ younger brother. I dont think Ive ever talked to him as an equal. I dont know any more about his life than he knows about mine. I couldnt tell you what he went to school for or his currant rank in the Army. He couldnt tell you the name of my last girlfriend or what it is that Im doing in California. Hes always been a good brother but hes 8 years older than me so he always had his life and I always had mine. I was 10 when he moved out of the house and Ive only seen him sparaticly since. This will be my first attempt to ask him whats wrong? I wrote him an e-mail but Im not even sure that he uses that address anymore. I have his home number but Im pretty sure he isnt there. He has a cell but Id feel like I was bothering him. Im always afraid that someone is in the middle of something important when I call them on a cell. Not to mention I really dont like phones at all.
Its not like Im just distant from him. Im like this with my whole family. I hardly talk to anyone outside my immediate family. My sister is the person thats the closest to me and I still only talk to her once a month... maybe. The last time I saw any member of my family was in March and before that, it had been 2 years. When I go home I never feel home because I dont feel like those people know me but It mostly my fault because I never let them in. Im like this with the general population. I could go on forever about this but Ill spare you.
I think Im gonna disappear for a while. Theres a lot of work I haven't been doing because Ive been spending too much time with you guys. Maybe youll think about me after Ive been bumped out of your bookmarked friends list. Ill be around but I doubt Ill actually be updating this for about a week. Besides if Av isnt here, whats the point?
This song always reminds me of when me, my aunt Zelda and my cousins used to sit in my grandmothers living room and watch music videos (Congradulations to caddy, cheech, ilovemikehunt, and traviscommeau for answering the question correctly. Plane ticket not included. Void where prohibited. :
Can I kick it? To my Tribe that flows in layers
Right now, Phife is a poem sayer
At times, I'm a studio conveyor
Mr. Dinkins, would you please be my mayor?
You'll be doing us a really big favor
Boy this track really has a lot of flavor
When it comes to rhythms, Quest is your savior
Follow us for the funky behavior
Make a note on the rhythm we gave ya
Feel free, drop your pants, check your ha-ir
Do you like the garments that we wear?
I instruct you to be the obeyer
A rhythm recipe that you'll savor
Doesn't matter if you're minor or major
Yes, the Tribe of the game, rhythm player
As you inhale like a breath of fresh air
Can I kick it? (Yes, you can!)
Can I kick it? (Yes, you can!)
Can I kick it? (Yes, you can!)
Well, I'm gone (Go on then!)
In my last journal I had a lot of questions about break ups and whatnot. About ten minutes after I hit save entry my grandmother called. She called to tell me that my oldest brother (the one in my pics.) is getting a divorce. No one knows why. According to her, hes just tired of being married. It looks like hes just having a Im thirty plus and Im scared crisis. It also seems that the divorce in one sided. His wife doesnt appear to show any signs of wanting to end it. And I love my sister-in-law. I dont want to lose another big sister. ( Damn I miss you Z. Sometimes I wonder if all this would be happening if you were still here.) His son is starting to act up in school which is something he never did before. So I suppose he knows something is going on.
This isnt completely out of character for him because he is a bit selfish (all my siblings are, including me.) but this seems a little drastic. My relationship with my brother has always been Older brother/ younger brother. I dont think Ive ever talked to him as an equal. I dont know any more about his life than he knows about mine. I couldnt tell you what he went to school for or his currant rank in the Army. He couldnt tell you the name of my last girlfriend or what it is that Im doing in California. Hes always been a good brother but hes 8 years older than me so he always had his life and I always had mine. I was 10 when he moved out of the house and Ive only seen him sparaticly since. This will be my first attempt to ask him whats wrong? I wrote him an e-mail but Im not even sure that he uses that address anymore. I have his home number but Im pretty sure he isnt there. He has a cell but Id feel like I was bothering him. Im always afraid that someone is in the middle of something important when I call them on a cell. Not to mention I really dont like phones at all.
Its not like Im just distant from him. Im like this with my whole family. I hardly talk to anyone outside my immediate family. My sister is the person thats the closest to me and I still only talk to her once a month... maybe. The last time I saw any member of my family was in March and before that, it had been 2 years. When I go home I never feel home because I dont feel like those people know me but It mostly my fault because I never let them in. Im like this with the general population. I could go on forever about this but Ill spare you.
I think Im gonna disappear for a while. Theres a lot of work I haven't been doing because Ive been spending too much time with you guys. Maybe youll think about me after Ive been bumped out of your bookmarked friends list. Ill be around but I doubt Ill actually be updating this for about a week. Besides if Av isnt here, whats the point?
This song always reminds me of when me, my aunt Zelda and my cousins used to sit in my grandmothers living room and watch music videos (Congradulations to caddy, cheech, ilovemikehunt, and traviscommeau for answering the question correctly. Plane ticket not included. Void where prohibited. :
Can I kick it? To my Tribe that flows in layers
Right now, Phife is a poem sayer
At times, I'm a studio conveyor
Mr. Dinkins, would you please be my mayor?
You'll be doing us a really big favor
Boy this track really has a lot of flavor
When it comes to rhythms, Quest is your savior
Follow us for the funky behavior
Make a note on the rhythm we gave ya
Feel free, drop your pants, check your ha-ir
Do you like the garments that we wear?
I instruct you to be the obeyer
A rhythm recipe that you'll savor
Doesn't matter if you're minor or major
Yes, the Tribe of the game, rhythm player
As you inhale like a breath of fresh air
Can I kick it? (Yes, you can!)
Can I kick it? (Yes, you can!)
Can I kick it? (Yes, you can!)
Well, I'm gone (Go on then!)
VIEW 17 of 17 COMMENTS
By the way, i'm sorry about ur brother wanting a divorce. I'm sure if u ever contact him in some ways, he will realize that u care about what happens in his life -- could be a good thing or bad thing but hey at least u are letting him know that u are in his life...right??
I don't know..maybe I should shut the fuck up about things I dont know. Just a thought tho. Leeh..by the way, Tribe called Quest reminds me of my high school good times. I used to be so in love with Q-tip...