igobymanynames

I'm getting sick. It's 4am and I'm sneezing too much to sleep. .

Well, I had about an hour of time to myself yesterday. It's either that or the on-coming sickness that is making me feel so completely out of sorts. I wrote exactly nothing whe I finally got home. I reead exactly nothing. I had 0 interesting thoughts worth writing down and I am...
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In the end, nothing made me feel better yesterday, but I did wake up clear, open and strong-willed this morning. And to make up for last night, I saw my favorite niece who didn't recognize me with my beard (she's 2 1/2), but I made her fall in love with me all over again. And I was surprised that my 5 month old nephew not...
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I feel like every word has been sucked out of me. Every feeling trickless off and ends in silence. I think this means that I need to have some interesting food. I forget this too often, but all it really takes to stop the onset of a mild depression -- and that is what this numbness and sloth indicates -- all one needs is soem...
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So, in thinking about sexual desire vs sexual orientation and my hatred of defintition for these sorts of things I have to leave it like this -- There are many fruity flavors in the rainbow and I can't see why somone would want to limit their desire to just one menu.

Clutch on my car is out again. just like on thanksgiving.
I have a dead kennedys song running through my head now.

Later...
On the bright side, I'll be seeing my Elise tomorrow night. While there is no drought of strong, challenging, interesting, brilliant, thoughtful and constantly curious women in the world, she consistently pushes herself through my force field with the sheer power of...
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Indian wedding costume

I'm totally biased because I'm fascinated with India, but I think Indian wedding dress is one of the most stunning and beautiful things I have seen. I prob'ly say that about a few things though. But the ornamentation (jewelry, make-up, clothing) is often excessive yet manages to come off as the exact opposite of gaudy and tacky. Don't get me wrong, I...
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so many questions for this world but the day is over. Why do the words for the questions come when I am not capable of answering?

It is always like this. Maybe notes will help.

sexual orientation vs. lust/desire - differences, new questions, problems for science, fluidity
community - freedom, problems, power, fear, opposition, state of nature, mass media, communication
gender distinct from sexual orientation...
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I can't remember the rest of that dream. It was the most detailed dream I had had in along time. That's frustrating.

Anyway, my boss was fired at work, This is a good thing and I might add that it is not cruel to fire someone before Christmas, if that person is indeed cruel herself. nevermind, that I couldn't help but resent being managed by...
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M and M and a coworker and a couple of others in a small car. I opened up an email on the screen in the back seat that was embedded in the back ofthe front passenger seat. It was from one of the M's. We're moving she said. She gave a list of names some were moving to Jdawa and some were moving to Aurselo,...
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...
What are you doing here?
Are you hitting your chest?
Fending yourself?
Forcing yourself into pain and sorrow
Like there 's no tomorrow?!?!

Useless pain and sorrow.

To fill you up with power,
life's both sweet and sour.
...
He looks at me hopeles with tears in his eyes
He goes out the window and up on the roof
Naked Man... Naked Man ......
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need and love.

Do you confuse the two? Like confusing gravity for the effect of gravity? That is, while love may not be understood, we understand it by acts.

"But how else would you weigh it"

So you need to measure love to believe in it? But that's fear and it stands in the way of love. Honestly, trust is never permanent, people grow and...
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So, not much yesterday, and not much today. Why is that? I am having trouble listening to people lately. At some point their words fade into air. Even those I love the most. And they're not boring. I feel fine alone and then when people come to me, I feel the force field rise. What to do what to do....

Maybe that's what has slowed...
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