iamavisitor

So many times I'm having the unrealistic and egocentric feeling "if only the others could see what I am inside, what I think, what I feel ...". Just watched the french movie "The diving bell and the butterfly" inspired by the book of the same name. It's the true story of a guy having a Locked-in syndrome after a stroke at the age of 42. He can only communicate using eyes blinks. In this story a woman falls in love with him, knowing him only through this communication mode, and it made me wonder about this thought I talked about just earlier. In fact this is clearly not the same as having the ability to see through people, because even in this poor condition, the locked-in syndrom victim can filter what he wants to say. But it makes me wonder.

Would it be that nice to have anyone reading my mind ? As much as I love myself, I know many won't be happy to see through me constantly. As much as I persuade myself that I am sincere with people, would that be enough for them ? And all those times, when I play with reality not to harm people I love, how would it be seen ? And when I'm in a bad mood ?

And Imagine you finally open yourself to someone you really really are into, and this person isn't interested in you at all ? Knowing that this time there is no possibility of misinterpretation, misunderstanding ? How painful would that be ?

Don't even know why I think about this, and why I writed this blog, given I didn't write anything in years. It's just how I felt anyway ...