it's 11:55 and i ask "am i still alive?" to any one who'll here my words yeah it's too soon to pack a saturday night in but something just happened that'll probably spark the lightnin of some amazing writin and the truth is what i'm fightin and this truth is all too frightnin, still, i'm just lookin for the right thing the love of another in my heart and i still want you around we should never split apart, we should never have taken walks together we should never shared talks of wether my intentions were completely plutonic that's just demonic and destructive and laced with chronic i confessed all the things that i did holding onto a hope that i knew was already dead. so i stay blue in the midnight dew that night you ran me through with a steak of truth outback of mainely brews why not see it through? why not let thing progress naturally? the fact that you said this makes me write on unhappily so sad to see the closest thing i've been to tears in years and in my mind i fear nothing but the dreaded speaches that make me long for sandy beaches and some one who acts on what she preaches or even teachescause you preach what you feel and you teach all you knowand while i practice flow and inspirational verse you made my minde blow with a sensational burst. it could be worst no wait i need to rethink and if i dwell on this it's gonna force me to drink and get drunk and get completely shitfaced until i find a place that demands not that i race but that i keep pace and keep up with the rest, just keep the breath in my chest and repair all the rest, repair the broken , abused and tormented and onto my kind ears your sorrow was vented and you repented and crushed the hope i invented, the hand i extended and some words that my friends said. cause people talk shit and some are there to recive it and they're the first and i'm the second and i guess that's the difference between us. the nicest guy that you'll never get the chance to know and you're the worst excuse for humnity served up in a cancer bowl or a tray of ash , a wasted of cash, a face to smash and all ah y'all can kiss my ass cause it's a arrived the flip of the words you can sip my turds take a drink from my procelan and go fuck all the whores you can, go declare all the wars you can. you're just a fan just an impressed onlooker, just an angel in devil garb and i fell off your level hard and rose again for a strole down resurection boulevard, take a left down memory lane and a hard right just to try and conceal my pain. i've been detained and imprisioned for nothing yetand if you're up for the challenge then i suggest that we make a bet cause this is less than an idle threat, this is more like what i regret even more like when our eyes met and you approached me and said we should have a chat. ass up face down one word and i hit the mat i never hit back, never made my retort, never said a single thing for you to twist and distort and i never got another kiss, not that i would report. to kiss and tell is just pissing in the wishing well. it's telling jokes that kids would tell. yelling with no need to yell and i'm in hell i'm in some sort of purgitory i'm sisyphus s on a hill and i'm praying for my back to break wondering how much i can scratch and fake and addgitate. wondering if i'll ever graduate so mad at fate that if fate were incarnate i'd smile and scrape with a blade all along his nape while he tries escape from this nightmare i inflict, from these lyrics that i spit and the craniums i split, yeah i'll kick maybe even punch him too what's he gonna do? he's atherial kinda like my image of you. 