okay. i had a real entry planned, but thanks to Hugodwarf and Trebo, you're getting this instead:
20 facts about Hyena:
1. i don't care how much coffee you drink in a day. i drink way more. probably like ten times as much.
2. i got thrown out of a bar (because the bar was closing, not because i was fucking shit up) for the first time last night. or at least the first time that i couldn't leave and go to another bar.
3. i meticulously pluck my eyebrows, but don't shave.
4. i have an eerie ability to predict fashion trends months before they become popular. so far, i have chosen to use this power for good.
5. i didn't think "The Nightmare Before Christmas" was that great. i really don't understand what all the fuss is about.
6. i only see two movies per year in the theatre. last year both of them were "Pirates of the Carribean". this year i have only seen "Sin City". i hate theatres.
7. for some reason, i went through a thing when i was 13 or 14 where i memorized a bunch of poems. i still remember them, but never bothered to memorize any more.
8. i can hex you. and i'll do it, too. i'm very good at that sort of thing.
9. i have not owned a car in six years.
10. i was the prom queen in high school. ask melvina. she was there.
11. i don't do any illegal drugs. let's just they exasperate my pre-existing "conditions".
12. i'm a serial realtionshipist. i have not been single for more than a month or two since i was 15. motherfuckers be lining up, yo.
13. i collect Virgin Mary stuff. icons, knick knacks, etc. someday melvina and i plan to combine my Mary collection with her Jesus collection. and then, i guess we'll stare at it all. and feel... holy. or. something.
14. my favorite bird, ever since i was four years old, is the vulture. they're neat.
15. i fucking hate rabbits.
16. every boyfriend i've ever had has tried to buy black roses for me. they think they're all clever, too, like no one's ever thought of it. i'd much rather have orchids, incidentally.
17. to my knowledge, there are no naked, semi-naked, or psuedo-naked pictures of me on the internet. considering that in real life i'll get naked for the flimsiest of reasons, i'm quite proud of that act of restraint.
18. i know all the words to every Leonard Cohen song ever. and will sing along to them. whether you like it or not. i'm unstoppable like that.
19. i'm really glad i'm almost done with this list.
20. i've been banned from a roller rink, a strip club, and the Tulane University library. i'd tell you how/why this happened, but honestly anything you could make up would probably be more interesting than the truth.
i'm supposed to list three people, and then those people have to post 20 facts about themselves.
but i'm not going to.
the buck stops here, folks.
thank you, and goodnight.
-Hyena.
20 facts about Hyena:
1. i don't care how much coffee you drink in a day. i drink way more. probably like ten times as much.
2. i got thrown out of a bar (because the bar was closing, not because i was fucking shit up) for the first time last night. or at least the first time that i couldn't leave and go to another bar.
3. i meticulously pluck my eyebrows, but don't shave.
4. i have an eerie ability to predict fashion trends months before they become popular. so far, i have chosen to use this power for good.
5. i didn't think "The Nightmare Before Christmas" was that great. i really don't understand what all the fuss is about.
6. i only see two movies per year in the theatre. last year both of them were "Pirates of the Carribean". this year i have only seen "Sin City". i hate theatres.
7. for some reason, i went through a thing when i was 13 or 14 where i memorized a bunch of poems. i still remember them, but never bothered to memorize any more.
8. i can hex you. and i'll do it, too. i'm very good at that sort of thing.
9. i have not owned a car in six years.
10. i was the prom queen in high school. ask melvina. she was there.
11. i don't do any illegal drugs. let's just they exasperate my pre-existing "conditions".
12. i'm a serial realtionshipist. i have not been single for more than a month or two since i was 15. motherfuckers be lining up, yo.
13. i collect Virgin Mary stuff. icons, knick knacks, etc. someday melvina and i plan to combine my Mary collection with her Jesus collection. and then, i guess we'll stare at it all. and feel... holy. or. something.
14. my favorite bird, ever since i was four years old, is the vulture. they're neat.
15. i fucking hate rabbits.
16. every boyfriend i've ever had has tried to buy black roses for me. they think they're all clever, too, like no one's ever thought of it. i'd much rather have orchids, incidentally.
17. to my knowledge, there are no naked, semi-naked, or psuedo-naked pictures of me on the internet. considering that in real life i'll get naked for the flimsiest of reasons, i'm quite proud of that act of restraint.
18. i know all the words to every Leonard Cohen song ever. and will sing along to them. whether you like it or not. i'm unstoppable like that.
19. i'm really glad i'm almost done with this list.
20. i've been banned from a roller rink, a strip club, and the Tulane University library. i'd tell you how/why this happened, but honestly anything you could make up would probably be more interesting than the truth.
i'm supposed to list three people, and then those people have to post 20 facts about themselves.
but i'm not going to.
the buck stops here, folks.
thank you, and goodnight.
-Hyena.
VIEW 6 of 6 COMMENTS
youve got competition on the coffee drinking
i can put down two or three pots within a few hours
with a LOT of sugar haha.
(when im not sticking to drinking entire caseloads of energy drinks in a day mind you
you rock
these are fun to read but im lazy and NEVER want to have to fill one out kthx