look, look, i'm a working gal! i am an intern on a hip new sitcom. and hotcurry is my unexpected office-mate! i found this out from recognizing the gorgeous painting she did of sg katie on the wall. anyway working there is awesome and the writers are also way awesome. i get to copy things for them and sit around watching them revise scripts. it rules.

so i had a dinner meeting with the executive producer who read and liked my pilot. my first-ever business meeting! was incredibly glamorous, thrilling, flattering, etc.

taste of success has only made me hungrier for more (kind of like cake). fantasies about my own show, swanky office, adoring groupie sex, etc. now constant and distracting from actual life.

in slightly related news, I HAVE WAY TOO MANY WRITING / DIRECTING PROJECTS TO HANDLE and it's freaking me out.

currently looking at the the powerup film grant page online and frustrated because i want to enter contests, get movies made, etc. but i live in fear of losing artistic control. why do they all want to take all the control and the rights away from the writer? fucking "high concept, marketability" shit!

i need power. and status. i am possibly VERY slowly gaining these things but it's not enough. i want success NOW!!!!

i'm going to wind up shooting my own dinky little films forever just so i can know i have all the rights to the material. ugh, i'm getting all obsessive and psycho about this.

i really hope to become like an insane reclusive artist. like howard hughes!

wave of the future! wave of the future! wave of the future!