It's been a while since I've updated, and since I'm up and shit..I thought, what the fuck?
Also, I've had a cocktail, a strong one(I've been having trouble sleeping), so now I'm all groggy and shit, and thought, hey fuck, when I'm half asleep, I think better...mind you, I may not write better.
Every night now, since this Erin thing, I've been trying to fall asleep with the soundtrack of 'Somewhere in Time', which is a fairly cheesey 80's love story, but admittingly, I love the god damn movie, and LOVE LOVE LOVE the soundtrack. It's all classical, and yeah, kind of sappy love music. Rachmoninofh(I probably spelled that wrong, and I'm to lazy to go and get the CD case to check the spelling), but I love the god damn music, it calms me, and relaxes me more than any other means of sleep aid.
So anywho, I've been keeping myself distracted and trying to keep my mind off this Erin thing, and trying not to blame myself, and hoping for the best. And the past few days, I've been pretty good about it, so no sappy shit in this journal entry. I came to the conclusion, that if it's meant to be, it's meant to be-and there are some things I have no control over. Still, I say I hope for the best, but I don't expect it either. Though I want us to get back together, if I hold that thought-I'll only hurt more. Ok, starting to get sappy again...
So here's the course of my day, as boring as it may seem to you:
1) Got up, kissed the cats-got dressed, took out the lunch I had prepared for work(both mine and Erin's, as it makes me feel good to make her meals)
2)Proceded to brush my teeth(yeah, boner city)
3)Fucked with my hair, as there's not much left now, so that didn't take long.
4)Said goodbye to the kitties, and left for my parents house.
5)Got to my parents house(I go over there to let there dog out).
6)Picked up the morning paper, got to the SUDUKO puzzle, and proceded to the comode.
7)As morning habit procedes, I take a dump as I do the puzzle-it's only a one star, so it takes only a couple of minutes. Generally, the length or duration of my 'poop session' depends on the difficulty of the SUDOKU puzzle.
8) I can't believe I just talked about my poop session, I mean, how embarassing really-but fuck it, everyone poops.
9) I take the dog out, along with a cool Marb Red(dumb ass habit, smoking you know), and smoke as I watch him do his thing in the yard.
10)I go back inside, ponder as to what to do with my time, and log into the computer.
11)I make a few comments in a few people's journals, and leave SG.
12)I can't remember all of this in between shit ok
13)At some point, I go into yahoo games, and start this other fucking addictive game of 'Rocket Mania', which takes so much time, but it's fucking fun.
14)I log out of the computer, and proceed to the crossword puzzle. My dad always starts it, usually finishes it-but today he didn't. So I mentally answer his missing words. I don't fill them in anymore, otherwise, I find the next morning when I go over there(maybe out of spite) he's starts to do the sudoku puzzle, which pisses me off.
15) I smoke another cigarette
16) I come back inside, and read the obituaries- a morbid habit, but I have to see if anyone I know has died, or had someone close to them die.
17) I head for work sometime later, with the lunch in hand-and go inside after listening to 20 minutes of music in the car. Usually, I draw in one of my sketchbooks for 20 minutes before work-as I'm one of those annoying fucks that gets to work way to early.
18)I go in, punch in, and proceed to do my boss thing, getting numbers and shit for our start up meeting.
19)I hate numbers, but I've always been good with them for some reason, math has always been one of my strongest points.
20) I do the work thing, and really, it sucks-it's boring, I have to make people mad and shit when I tell them to do something or move to another section-but fuck it, it's my job. I try to stay cool with everyone, and lately, I've been making rounds with the 200 plus people in our department to let them know, I'm there to help them.
21) I leave work-fuck yeah. And go to the very store that employs me to buy some shit I need.
22) I come home, talk to BlueBear3 for a bit before he leaves.
23)I eat some cold pizza-well, I warmed it up in the oven-it's best that way.
24) I drink a beer
25) I turn on the Sopranos DVD-I'm working my way backwards- I'm on Season 3, after watching seasons 4 and 5 last week-but man is that fucking show the bomb-whatthe fuck, bomb? That's so fucking old...
26)I procede to start working on a sculpture Imaking Erin for Christmas. We're not really supposed to buy gifts for each other this year, so rather, I making her gift- a lifesize caricature bust of David Bowie, or so I hope.
27)I'm using this plasticine shit, which is really hard but durable clay, that never hardens fully-so it's a trip-my plan is to make the sculpt, make a rubber mold of it, and cast it in stone, like my very Nick Cage sculpt(in my artwork albums).
28) I also purchased a huge pictorial book of Bowie on SUnday, for reference material.
29) I finish watching the third episode of the Sopranos, season 3-fucking great show man.
30)I talk to the cats(as I'm lonely), and they tell me they're hungry, so I feed them.
31)I shave-not using shaving cream, but conditioner-that's right mofos-mother fucking hair conditioner-it works awesome, I learned this from watching Queer Eye for the Straight Guy...don't laugh, but another great show.
32) I procede to tell the cats I was going to take a shower, Zeke(she's such a bitch) starts whining and crying while I was in the shower, but I still talked to her as I was washing my hair and shit...you can carry on a conversation with her you know.
33)I get out of the shower, dress...and go out to the kitchen.
34) I make Erin and I lunch for tomorrow, well today technically, as it's almost three in the fucking morning.
35) I make a cocktail-ol' southern comfort and sprite, really, I prefer 7-up, but fuck it, I had sprite.
36) I talk to the kitties some more(does that sound pathetic?, yeah, it does)
37)I continue to work on the framing of the sculpt some more, and turn on episode 4 of the Sopranos.
38) I put the sculpt away, as I'm once again entranced into the whole fucking Sopranos thing...
39) I turn it off after it's over, and in a sleepy decision, decide to log in to BlueBear3's computer, and update my journal finally.
40)And if your still reading this, you were either enthralled with what I had to say-or, you were as bored as I am.
41)I'm a creature of habit though, so I try to keep the same method going-boring ain't it?
42)And, as of now, I've decided to go to bed-I think after wrok tonight, instead of the SOpranos, I'm going to watch 'Amelie' again, as it's one of the best fucking movies ever-and recently, I've been doing nice thing to or for people anonymously, and it feels good.
43) I still don't have the balls to do bad shit to people anonymously, though it's tempting.
ANd I'm rambling, but no number on this one, so it must mean I'm close to finishing?
Yeppers, I'm done...
Also, I've had a cocktail, a strong one(I've been having trouble sleeping), so now I'm all groggy and shit, and thought, hey fuck, when I'm half asleep, I think better...mind you, I may not write better.
Every night now, since this Erin thing, I've been trying to fall asleep with the soundtrack of 'Somewhere in Time', which is a fairly cheesey 80's love story, but admittingly, I love the god damn movie, and LOVE LOVE LOVE the soundtrack. It's all classical, and yeah, kind of sappy love music. Rachmoninofh(I probably spelled that wrong, and I'm to lazy to go and get the CD case to check the spelling), but I love the god damn music, it calms me, and relaxes me more than any other means of sleep aid.
So anywho, I've been keeping myself distracted and trying to keep my mind off this Erin thing, and trying not to blame myself, and hoping for the best. And the past few days, I've been pretty good about it, so no sappy shit in this journal entry. I came to the conclusion, that if it's meant to be, it's meant to be-and there are some things I have no control over. Still, I say I hope for the best, but I don't expect it either. Though I want us to get back together, if I hold that thought-I'll only hurt more. Ok, starting to get sappy again...
So here's the course of my day, as boring as it may seem to you:
1) Got up, kissed the cats-got dressed, took out the lunch I had prepared for work(both mine and Erin's, as it makes me feel good to make her meals)
2)Proceded to brush my teeth(yeah, boner city)
3)Fucked with my hair, as there's not much left now, so that didn't take long.
4)Said goodbye to the kitties, and left for my parents house.
5)Got to my parents house(I go over there to let there dog out).
6)Picked up the morning paper, got to the SUDUKO puzzle, and proceded to the comode.
7)As morning habit procedes, I take a dump as I do the puzzle-it's only a one star, so it takes only a couple of minutes. Generally, the length or duration of my 'poop session' depends on the difficulty of the SUDOKU puzzle.
8) I can't believe I just talked about my poop session, I mean, how embarassing really-but fuck it, everyone poops.
9) I take the dog out, along with a cool Marb Red(dumb ass habit, smoking you know), and smoke as I watch him do his thing in the yard.
10)I go back inside, ponder as to what to do with my time, and log into the computer.
11)I make a few comments in a few people's journals, and leave SG.
12)I can't remember all of this in between shit ok
13)At some point, I go into yahoo games, and start this other fucking addictive game of 'Rocket Mania', which takes so much time, but it's fucking fun.
14)I log out of the computer, and proceed to the crossword puzzle. My dad always starts it, usually finishes it-but today he didn't. So I mentally answer his missing words. I don't fill them in anymore, otherwise, I find the next morning when I go over there(maybe out of spite) he's starts to do the sudoku puzzle, which pisses me off.
15) I smoke another cigarette
16) I come back inside, and read the obituaries- a morbid habit, but I have to see if anyone I know has died, or had someone close to them die.
17) I head for work sometime later, with the lunch in hand-and go inside after listening to 20 minutes of music in the car. Usually, I draw in one of my sketchbooks for 20 minutes before work-as I'm one of those annoying fucks that gets to work way to early.
18)I go in, punch in, and proceed to do my boss thing, getting numbers and shit for our start up meeting.
19)I hate numbers, but I've always been good with them for some reason, math has always been one of my strongest points.
20) I do the work thing, and really, it sucks-it's boring, I have to make people mad and shit when I tell them to do something or move to another section-but fuck it, it's my job. I try to stay cool with everyone, and lately, I've been making rounds with the 200 plus people in our department to let them know, I'm there to help them.
21) I leave work-fuck yeah. And go to the very store that employs me to buy some shit I need.
22) I come home, talk to BlueBear3 for a bit before he leaves.
23)I eat some cold pizza-well, I warmed it up in the oven-it's best that way.
24) I drink a beer
25) I turn on the Sopranos DVD-I'm working my way backwards- I'm on Season 3, after watching seasons 4 and 5 last week-but man is that fucking show the bomb-whatthe fuck, bomb? That's so fucking old...
26)I procede to start working on a sculpture Imaking Erin for Christmas. We're not really supposed to buy gifts for each other this year, so rather, I making her gift- a lifesize caricature bust of David Bowie, or so I hope.
27)I'm using this plasticine shit, which is really hard but durable clay, that never hardens fully-so it's a trip-my plan is to make the sculpt, make a rubber mold of it, and cast it in stone, like my very Nick Cage sculpt(in my artwork albums).
28) I also purchased a huge pictorial book of Bowie on SUnday, for reference material.
29) I finish watching the third episode of the Sopranos, season 3-fucking great show man.
30)I talk to the cats(as I'm lonely), and they tell me they're hungry, so I feed them.
31)I shave-not using shaving cream, but conditioner-that's right mofos-mother fucking hair conditioner-it works awesome, I learned this from watching Queer Eye for the Straight Guy...don't laugh, but another great show.
32) I procede to tell the cats I was going to take a shower, Zeke(she's such a bitch) starts whining and crying while I was in the shower, but I still talked to her as I was washing my hair and shit...you can carry on a conversation with her you know.
33)I get out of the shower, dress...and go out to the kitchen.
34) I make Erin and I lunch for tomorrow, well today technically, as it's almost three in the fucking morning.
35) I make a cocktail-ol' southern comfort and sprite, really, I prefer 7-up, but fuck it, I had sprite.
36) I talk to the kitties some more(does that sound pathetic?, yeah, it does)
37)I continue to work on the framing of the sculpt some more, and turn on episode 4 of the Sopranos.
38) I put the sculpt away, as I'm once again entranced into the whole fucking Sopranos thing...
39) I turn it off after it's over, and in a sleepy decision, decide to log in to BlueBear3's computer, and update my journal finally.
40)And if your still reading this, you were either enthralled with what I had to say-or, you were as bored as I am.
41)I'm a creature of habit though, so I try to keep the same method going-boring ain't it?
42)And, as of now, I've decided to go to bed-I think after wrok tonight, instead of the SOpranos, I'm going to watch 'Amelie' again, as it's one of the best fucking movies ever-and recently, I've been doing nice thing to or for people anonymously, and it feels good.
43) I still don't have the balls to do bad shit to people anonymously, though it's tempting.
ANd I'm rambling, but no number on this one, so it must mean I'm close to finishing?
Yeppers, I'm done...
VIEW 5 of 5 COMMENTS
lemuria:
thats what i do. im a hynotherapist and past life regressions are my favorite. its interesting to me that your brain will take you to the life you need to learn from in this life. they are very fun to do. 
i think i had a more recent past life living in the same town i do now. its weird... 
i think i had a more recent past life living in the same town i do now. its weird...
lemuria:
yes that all makes sense to me. i think its all just a matter of tapping into that part of your brain that has what youre supposed to remember this time. henry leo bolduc, edgar cayce, and ruth montgomery all have written really good books on the subject. but, yes i do agree with you.