SOMETIMES LIFE GETS CONSTIPATED...
Sometimes the shit going on at work gets all backed up.
Every confidence breaking interaction with my mentor.
Every asshole-ish comment out of my boss's mouth...
Every mistake I make and missed opportunity to excel.
Sometimes the shit at home gets all backed up.
Ever since the 'thing' with my roommate, all the negativity has gotten backed up. Making the comfort and sanctuary I used to feel more like that sick feeling you get when you haven't crapped in days.
And sometimes life just shits on you for the sake of shitting on you.
Like hearing the the love of my life is not only moving in with his girlfriend, but having him say that it would be 'hard to call me' now because of said girlfriend.
Heartbreaking, and yet eye opening, to see a man who I couldn't imagine allowing ANYONE, least of all some pussy, to make it hard to call the best friend I was to him.
***
My life had gotten so constipated I couldn't even get out of bed...
And the life threw me a laxitive...
My boss informed me that I would soon be working with a new mentor in the shop.
And I sat here last Saturday seeing my life for the backed up mess that it had become...and knowing that something would soon be shifting...and I saw that now was the time to step up.
Get the fuck out of bed...and clear a space in my life for the breakthrough.
So I did...got up, cleaned my room, cleaned the house (which i'd stopped doing after roommate put my dishes in the trash...even though i'm the only one who cleans up around here...), sterilized the bathroom...and finally, broke out my sweetgrass and smudged the house down to rid it of all the negativity that's been hanging around lately.
***
I showed up to work in a MUCH better mood than I have in weeks...and despite the fact I haven't been switched over to my new mentor, I successfully got six cars out of the shop this week all on my own.
My roommates, after getting a chance to see what the house would look like if I stopped cleaning...have not only truly understood the WHY of my upset with my dishes in the trash...but have been a LOT better about cleaning up after themselves on their own.
I still miss home terribly...to the point that when I sleep I dream of NYC...but I'm committed to not running at the first sign of trouble.
I believe that all signs pointed me here.
I believe in my heart I'm here for a reason.
I might not be meant to stay...but I'm meant to be here NOW.
So bring on the miracle!!!
I'm ready and waiting!!!
Sometimes the shit going on at work gets all backed up.
Every confidence breaking interaction with my mentor.
Every asshole-ish comment out of my boss's mouth...
Every mistake I make and missed opportunity to excel.
Sometimes the shit at home gets all backed up.
Ever since the 'thing' with my roommate, all the negativity has gotten backed up. Making the comfort and sanctuary I used to feel more like that sick feeling you get when you haven't crapped in days.
And sometimes life just shits on you for the sake of shitting on you.
Like hearing the the love of my life is not only moving in with his girlfriend, but having him say that it would be 'hard to call me' now because of said girlfriend.
Heartbreaking, and yet eye opening, to see a man who I couldn't imagine allowing ANYONE, least of all some pussy, to make it hard to call the best friend I was to him.
***
My life had gotten so constipated I couldn't even get out of bed...
And the life threw me a laxitive...
My boss informed me that I would soon be working with a new mentor in the shop.
And I sat here last Saturday seeing my life for the backed up mess that it had become...and knowing that something would soon be shifting...and I saw that now was the time to step up.
Get the fuck out of bed...and clear a space in my life for the breakthrough.
So I did...got up, cleaned my room, cleaned the house (which i'd stopped doing after roommate put my dishes in the trash...even though i'm the only one who cleans up around here...), sterilized the bathroom...and finally, broke out my sweetgrass and smudged the house down to rid it of all the negativity that's been hanging around lately.
***
I showed up to work in a MUCH better mood than I have in weeks...and despite the fact I haven't been switched over to my new mentor, I successfully got six cars out of the shop this week all on my own.
My roommates, after getting a chance to see what the house would look like if I stopped cleaning...have not only truly understood the WHY of my upset with my dishes in the trash...but have been a LOT better about cleaning up after themselves on their own.
I still miss home terribly...to the point that when I sleep I dream of NYC...but I'm committed to not running at the first sign of trouble.
I believe that all signs pointed me here.
I believe in my heart I'm here for a reason.
I might not be meant to stay...but I'm meant to be here NOW.
So bring on the miracle!!!
I'm ready and waiting!!!