holiday

i am in need of a major atittude adjustment. i view everything so negativly lately. i thought i was doing this cuz i was so unhappy with so many things......maybe im unhappy because i view things in a negative way. the first thing that has changed is my view on my job. so it sucks, whatever. its a job, not a carear. i need to be here because i have bills and i need to work, so i need to stop my bitching and grow up and just deal. second thing i have changed is my drinking. it became very obvious to me this weekend that i have a problem. i cant remember the last time i went to bed not half in the bag......im talking months. there were nights i would be so trashed i would say really mean things to my baby, have angry sex then tell him to never touch me again. when i woke up in the morning i had no memory of anything. i would hurt the most important person in my life and then have no memory of it. so im on day 2 of sobriety. going one day was a huge step for me. do i wanna stop drinking all together, no. but i need to get this shit under control, and i have no plans on drinking untill i can have one drink socially and thats it. i know i have a long way to go.
so me and hubby are having a tattoo party on sunday with hubby artist. i get to have my chest piece finally colored in!!! i am so excited.

xoxox