hohlraum

my head is so cloudy today and my stomach hurts , what the hell was i thinking ? drink 9 heinekens and then go to jack and coke , i must be a maniac .

pt was especially rough , god bless all of you who have no idea what its like to run 3 miles on a hangover and 4 hours of sleep ,...
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well , my day ended shitty too , i had some asshole mow the grass and spray it all over my new car , i was mildly heated to say the least , my fucking car is black and like 8 days old , so i am off here soon to wash it again.

another thing that really pissed me off today was this girl...
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well , my day has been shit so far and its only 0730 , first of all , had to get 6 viles of blood drawn , and i couldnt eat , drink , smoke , anything for 12 hours prior , now that thats over i get to go and piss in a cup , what a joy the army is.

i cant believe...
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Ramblings from a mad man.

So here I sit again at my computer rambling on my current thoughts , I feel a lot like an old ghost ship today , waning at the cresting smile of the cold blue ocean . My regret is my anchor and blind faith is my sail , but the winds of change arent blowing and my anchor weighs heavily...
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Letter to myself,
I am not sure what I am doing anymore , sometimes it just seems like this life isnt worth much , it feels like I am doing too much and reaping such little rewards , I feel like I should be doing better than I am right now .
It seems like I am just trying to make myself happier than humanly...
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Man last night was such a blur , started off in Truckau at a bar with a local band , they advertised heavy metal and we got huey lewis and the news , it was horrible, the germans have no sense of music categorization. So that blew. stayed there until like 1130 , left and went to the standard fallback bar. The Happy Rock. Which...
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