himes

In pondering why I love this new (old) book so fucking much I realized when my life turned. I found some old pictures of me from my late teens almost ten years ago. I looked so happy so energetic. Now I have the same basic outlook BUT i've grown quite a bit more intellectual and light years more dark (or at least opened me closet...
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I am visiting my parents this weekend, or i should say visited as the visit is almost over. I decided to confront the beast in the closet of my mind...THE PAST Ooohhhh! A long time ago i moved to new york - umm 3 and a half years i think. and when i did I left a pile of pictures - and pretty much EVERY...
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There are many pretty girls round here. A lot to take my mind off a razor sharp attention to detail. and maybe that is what I lack as an American - that razor for detail. like alcohol the flesh premeates my cortex leading to places more stimulated than thought. and I'm left with complacency.

I'm complacent that my country sucks right now


I'm complacent that...
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I still love you. Or what my be construed as love - was it? nevermind that love business.

I still desire you. To take you to ground - to lift your body again past pleasure and reason to a pain just so sweet - it blanks your mind and clips your spinal cord.

I want to fuck you numb. with a jackhammer and a few...
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I'm laying - listing perhaps - ne'er listless. always moving but where

I've been holding my thoughts lately. as my brain, some landfill for daydreams, slowly swells and constricts. it is a pulsating near numbness that occupies s of late.

There is much to be unsettled and irritated about - but nothing seems to resonate. My bell needs alignment, my timing tuned.

I want to...
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It's official - I'm a fully grown man! I took delivery of my first mattress set, and after a few engineering solutions - I'm now laying on 16" for springy goodness.

In under an hour and a half I managed to

-realize the box spring was simply too large for our spiral staircase.

- proceeded to have a "mentos moment" and sawed the fucker straight...
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I just saw Persepolis and I'm still trying to close my eyes. I loved it. Perhaps it was the dry sense of humor the film wielded along with a much deeper sense of humanity. Maybe the noiresque animated delivery moved me. More acurately I believe, for me at least, it cut through to my childhood when Nickelodeon playing more silent european cartoons while touching all...
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